Homer's Phobia/Quotes


 * Homer: It's been two hours now. How do you feel?
 * Bart: I dunno. I kinda want a cigarette.
 * Homer: Good, let's buy you a pack. What brand?
 * Bart: Anything slim.
 * Homer: DANG!




 * Marge: Homer, didn't John seem a little "festive" to you?
 * Homer: Couldn't agree more, happy as a clam.
 * 'Marge: He prefers the company of men!
 * Homer: Who doesn't?
 * Marge: Homer, listen carefully. John is a Ho - mo...
 * Homer: Right.
 * Marge: ...Sexual.
 * Homer: AAAAHHH!




 * Homer: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! I danced with a gay!




 * Marge: I'm very sorry you feel that way, because John invited us out on a drive today, and we're going.
 * Homer: Whoa! Not me. And not because John's gay, but because he's a sneak. He should have the good taste to mince around and let everyone know that he's... that way.
 * Marge: What on Earth are you talking about?
 * Homer: You know me, Marge. I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals FA-LAMING!




 * John: Oh don't you love those curtains? I have the same exact ones, but only in my bathroom. Didn't you just die when you found these?
 * Marge]]: Not really. They just had corn on them. Kitchen, corn?




 * John: Zzzzzap!




 * Bart: Oh, Dad. You are the living end.




 * Homer: You! I should have known.
 * John: Good morning, sunshine.
 * Marge: Homer, John brought us cactus candy.
 * Homer: Look, John, you seem like a perfectly nice guy and all. Just stay the hell away from my family!
 * John: Well, now you don't get any candy. No that's cruel. Just take a teensy piece.
 * Homer: No.
 * John: Homer, what have you got against gays?
 * Homer: You know. It's not... usual. If there was a law, it would be against it.




 * (whistle goes off)
 * Homer: Oh my god! What's happening now?
 * Rosco: We work hard, we play hard.
 * '''(Everybody Dance Now starts playing, as the whole room transforms into a Gay Nightclub)