Bart's Dog Gets an F/Quotes


 * Mrs. Winthrop's office. Bart enters with a leashed Santa's Little Helper
 * Bart: Mrs. Winthrop, may I have a minute of your time?
 * Mrs. Winthrop motions for Bart to have a seat
 * Bart: Look, I was thinking, since you are paid whether Santa's Little Helper fails or passes, why not just pass my dog anyway?
 * Emily Winthrop: Oh I get it. Lick a stamp on it, thank you very much, next please!
 * Bart: Yup!
 * Emily Winthrop{sighing}: Heavens to Murgatroyd! Bart, perhaps I cling to the old ways like a well-chewed shoe while the traditions I was weaned on are either neutered or put to sleep one by one. {stren tone} But my time has not yet passed! The world does not need another college graduate who does not know how to sit!
 * Santa's Little Helper fails to respond to command
 * Emily Winthrop: Pull the chain.
 * Bart: What?
 * Emily Winthrop: Correct the dog.
 * Bart: I do not want to strangle my dog.
 * Emily Winthrop: PULL THE BLOODY CHAIN, BOY!
 * An intimidated Bart pulls Santa's Little Helper's leash, who yelps then collapses on the floor
 * Bart: I am sorry, boy. It is not your fault you are so dumb.