Bart Has Two Mommies/Quotes

Quotes
Homer: "He has to finish paying off the planets. Did you see that ring He gave Saturn?"
 * Bart: "Why does God need our money?"

Rod: "What does 'gay' mean?" Bart: "Um, It means...you used to be afraid...but you're not anymore." Rod: (shouting down at Flanders) "I'm gay, Daddy! I'm gay! Mrs. Simpson made me gay!" Marge: (laughs nervously) "I believe he's saying...he's okay."
 * Bart (as he and Rod climb down the church steeple): "Don't let our hands touch it's gay."


 * Homer: "What are you talking about? Monkeys don't have feelings. If they did, my experiments on them could be called cruel."


 * Homer: (sarcastic tone) "Oh, you're so right! I guess I should be more concerned with Bart's safety than covering my own butt! And maybe I'm talking like this because I can't stop! Help me, Lisa, I have serious mental problems!"

Todd: "I cut myself on the knife playing Christian Clue." Rod: "The secular humanist in the school house with misinformation!"
 * Ned: (gasp) "A sliver from a band-aid wrapper! Call me Ned Zeppelin, but is one of my boys abraised and contused?!"

Marge: "Aw." Todd: (praying) "And please ask Mommy to come to Daddy in a dream so he knows how to cut our sandwiches." Marge: "Aw." Rod: (praying) "And please tell Mrs. Simpson it's rude to eavesdrop on our prayers." Marge: (surprised) "Oh." Rod: (praying) "But we forgive her." Marge: "Ooooo."
 * Rod: (praying) "And please thank Mrs. Simpson for giving as much fun as we had when Mommy was here."