Oh, Streetcar!

Oh, Streetcar! is a musical version of Tennessee Williams' play A Streetcar Named Desire. Several cast members of the town of Springfield put it on in the episode A Streetcar Named Marge. The songs for the show were composed by Alf Clausen and written by Jeff Martin. The song "New Orleans" gained a lot of controversy because of its lyrics portraying the city in a bad light. In response, in the following episode, Bart wrote on the chalkboard, "I will not defame New Orleans" as an apology.

The Cast

 * Chief Clancy Wiggum - Narrator
 * Marge Simpson - Blanche DuBois
 * Apu Nahasapeemepetilon - The Young Collector
 * Ned Flanders - Stanley Kowalski

Long Before the Superdome

 * Chief Wiggum:
 * Long before the Superdome,
 * Where the Saints of football play,
 * Lived a city that the damned call home.
 * Hear their hellish roundelay...

New Orleans
Ensemble:
 * New Or-le-ans,
 * Home of pirates, drunks, and whores,
 * New Or-le-ans,
 * Tacky overpriced souvenir stores.


 * If you want to go to Hell, you should take a trip
 * To the Sodom and Gomorra on the Mississip.


 * New Or-le-ans,
 * Stinky, rotten, vomiting, vile,
 * New Or-le-ans,
 * Putrid, brackish, maggoty, foul.


 * New Or-le-ans,
 * Crummy, lousy, rancid, and rank,
 * New Or-le-ans.

I Though My Life Would Be a Mardi Gras

 * Woman:
 * What's the matter, honey, are you lost?


 * Marge:
 * I'm lookin' for ma sister, Stella.


 * Lisa:
 * It's mom!


 * Homer:
 * Huh?


 * Marge:
 * Ma name is Blanche DuBois.


 * I thought my life would be a Mardi Gras,
 * A neverending party...
 * Ha!


 * I'm a faded southern dame
 * Without a dime.

I am Just a Simple Paper Boy

 * Apu:
 * I'm collecting for The Evening Star.


 * Marge:
 * Come here, I wanna kiss you just once, softly and sweetly on your mouth.


 * Apu:
 * I am just a simple paper boy,
 * No romance do I seek.
 * I just wanted forty cents
 * For my deliveries last week.


 * Will this bewitching floozy
 * Seduce this humble newsie?
 * Oh, what's a a paper to...do?


 * (she kisses him)


 * Woo-hoo!

Stella!

 * Ned Flanders:
 * STELLA!!!
 * STELLA!!!
 * Can't you hear me yell-a?
 * You're puttin' me through Hell-a?
 * Stella, STELLA!!!!

She Flies

 * (instrumental)

The Kindness of Strangers

 * Marge:
 * Whoever you are, I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.


 * Ensemble:
 * You can always depend on the kindness of strangers
 * To pluck up your spirits and shield you from dangers.


 * Marge:
 * Now here's a tip from Blanche you won't regret.


 * Cast:
 * A stranger's just a friend you haven't met!
 * You haven't met!
 * STREETCAR!