Monty Can't Buy Me Love/Quotes


 * Jerry Rude: Ever murder anybody?
 * Mr. Burns: Murder!? Well, mistakes have been made.


 * Homer: Well, if you wanted people to love you, you sure blew it with that insane rampage. But, you know what? To be loved, you have to be nice to people, every day, but to be hated; you don't have to do squat!
 * Burns: You know, perhaps you're right! I got so swept over the notion of being liked; I completely forgot who I am … I'm a selfish old crank.


 * Kent: Monster fever has gripped Springfield by the throat, and it's all thanks to one man. Montgomery Burns has captured not only a legendary monster, but also our hearts. And by the way, girls, he's single!
 * Selma: Single? Well, he passes the Selma test.