The War of the Simpsons/Quotes


 * Barney (to Patty) "Hey! You're Homer's sister-in-law, right? I remember you. But I don't remember you being so beau[burp]tiful!"
 * (She sprays him in the eyes with Mace)
 * Barney: "Oh, ow, hey, [burp] [cough] Is that a new kind of Mace? It's really painful!"


 * Bait Shop Clerk: Yep, 'General Sherman'. They say he's five hundred pounds of bottom-dwelling fury, don't you know.  No one knows how old he is, but if you ask me (and most people do), he's hundred years if he's a day.
 * Customer: And uh no one's ever caught him?
 * Bait Shop Clerk: Well, one fella came close. Went by the name of Homer.  Seven feet tall he was, with arms like tree trunks.  His eyes were like steel, cold, hard. Had a shock of hair, red like the fires of Hell...