Eternal Moonshine of the Simpson Mind/Quotes

(Grampa suggests that Homer should go see Professor Frink to help him remember what happened the night before.)

Homer: Really? Oh, that's great, Dad. How can I ever repay you?

Grampa: Punch that orderly who takes sips out of my juice.

Homer: Done.

(Cut to Homer punching an orderly who is about to make a bed.)

Grampa: No, wait. That's the guy that saved my life.

Homer: Strap me in, nerd!

Professor Frink: To me, "nerd" stands for Not Even Remotely Dorky. So thank you. Thank you for the compliment.

(Homer assumes the worst when he sees Marge on the couch with Duffman.)

Homer: The mother of my children with the reason for my children!

Homer: Dad, I can't remember what I did last night. Do have any idea?

Grampa: You come to me for help rememberin'? That's like asking your horse to do your taxes...which I did in 1998. (Shows a photo of horse using an adding machine.)

(Homer seeks Flanders help to find out what happened to him.)

Homer: Flanders, why did you call the cops last night?

Ned: I had to. I heard a hubbub, Bub.

Homer: What did I do?!

Ned: Well, I can't say for sure, but as a Christian, I assume the worst.