Gary Chalmers

"Skinnerrrrr!!!"

- Superintendent Chalmers' catchphrase

Gary Chalmers is the superintendent of Springfield's school district. He is the brother of the owner of The Pretzel Wagon Frank Ormand. After Frank dies, Gary is said to have sold the business. His sister in law is Amanda Ormand.

Biography
Chalmers originally hails from Utica, New York, but has also said that he comes from Queens, New York, Mexico (in a deleted scene) and then moved to Intercourse, Pennsylvania. He attended Ball State University and is a proud owner of a red 1979 Honda Accord (and later, a Camry, which Otto Mann promptly wrecks). In the episode How the Test Was Won, Seymour Skinner mentions that Chalmers has a daughter.

Chalmers is a strict, no-nonsense, and largely humorless man, with a short temper and low tolerance for disorder or rule-breaking; his general manner and personality like that of a military officer. Whenever he visits Springfield Elementary, some sort of disaster strikes. He produces extreme anxiety in Principal Skinner, who offers increasingly improbable stories to explain what is happening. Chalmers is known for throwing open the doors to the room and bellowing "SKINNERRRRR!!!" or "SEYMOUR!!!", to which Seymour stammers, "S-Superintendent Chalmers!" His catchphrase has caused some paranoia in Skinner. On a few occasions, he says Skinner's name (or in one case, words pronounced similarly to "Skinner" such as "Skimmers" ) this way when absolutely nothing has gone wrong, implying that he either pronounces Skinner's name this way by habit, or does it on purpose to scare him. Chalmers has shown a caring side towards Skinner, when he called out for Skinner and when he had a reply that Skinner was okay, he told Skinner to "Never do that again" (scare him).

Chalmers' own competence and dedication to his job are questionable. He let Ned Flanders allow the school to descend into anarchy when he was principal, freely admitting that he had fired Skinner for far less, explaining simply that "Skinner really bugged me." In fact, the only reason Chalmers even allowed Skinner to be reinstated as Principal that time was because Ned Flanders introduced prayer into the school (because Chalmers feels that religion should never be placed within school walls, just as facts don't have a place within an organized religion). When asked about Skinner's reinstatement, he said simply, "Ehh, he seems to know the students' names. " Chalmers seems disturbingly unconcerned with the school's decline, saying that "the way America's public schools are sliding, they'll all be like this in a matter of months. I say enjoy it — it's a hell of a toboggan ride!" He also promotes people based on personal bias as opposed to actual competence, promoting Principal Holloway, described by Skinner as a "drunk" and Chalmers as a "pill-popper," to assistant superintendent, overlooking the efforts made by Skinner to improve his school's standing. Ralph called him Super Nintendo Chalmers, which he makes a confused facial expression at. He says anything that ends with inner or nner, he would raise his tone, he once said "Stupid fish, don't you want to be my DINNERRRR!!!?" Chalmers was at one point a high school teacher, but was put off the profession after he was beaten up by the fight club thinking it was the "breakfast club." He was coerced back into teaching for a short while years later, taking Bart Simpson under his wing and managing to get through to the boy where others had failed.

When Springfield began erecting surveillance cameras around Springfield and 742 Evergreen Terrace is discovered to be a blind spot and transformed into a crowding place for rebellious activity, Superintendent Chalmers was spotted swinging nunchucks while prancing in a tutu.

Chalmers was seen dating Agnes Skinner, much to Seymour's dismay (although in other episodes he has mentioned he is married. In "Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts"). It is revealed that he is divorced.

Chalmers's sign is Sagittarius. In addition overseeing Springfield Elementary School, he also oversees Waverly Hills since his job as school Superintendent has him travel all over Springfield.

Future
In the episode "Future-Drama", which takes place in the future, the Superintendent is practically a vegetable, only capable of saying his trademark line. In the episode "Holidays of Future Passed, Superintendent Chalmers is shown to be frozen in the Springfield Cryogenic Facility, along with other elderly characters.

Comics
In a Simpsons Comic he states that he went to LSU.

Behind the Laughter
In the DVD commentary to "22 Short Films About Springfield", Simpsons creators noted that Superintendent Chalmers seems to be one of the few "normal" characters on the show, and Chalmers is frequently alone in his awareness of the show's zaniness.

Trivia

 * His first name was revealed to be Gary in Yokel Chords.
 * His hero is Theodore Roosevelt.
 * Edna and Chalmers were "doing it".
 * Ralph Wiggum addresses him as Super-Nintendo Chalmers.