Any Given Sundance/Quotes

Lisa: No toupees.

Homer: Whaaat, I'm going for the Shia LaBeouf thing. Not quite a nerd, not quite a hunk. Shia LaBeouf!

Homer: I never wanted to be famous for being mean. I wanted to be famous for catching Santa Claus.

Jim Jarmusch: I can eat a raw onion without crying.

Homer: Oh yeah? Prove it, Hollywood!

(Jim Jarmusch eats an onion and tears up)

Homer: Hey, you're crying!

Jim Jarmusch: Yes, but I'm crying about something else.

Superintendent Chalmers: (about the Springfield Creative Arts School)The whole school is made up of modeling clay! Every afternoon, they re-shape it just to get my goat!

(Narration during Nelson's documentary)

Nelson: I like to cry at the ocean, because only there do my tears seem small.

Marge: Thank God they're not jeering at us anymore.

Homer: I know. (pause) Kinda miss it.

Bart: I know! We'll be in another movie. And this time we'll act really bad!

Marge: No more Simpsons movies! One was plenty.

Marge: Call me old-fashioned, but I usually don't like movies that humiliate our family in front of the world.

(After seeing Nelson's documentary)

Man: Hey, Nelson! Say something poor!

Homer: Robert Redford? Guess what. A scissor runs through it.