The Haw-Hawed Couple/Quotes

Lisa: Mom, Bart's drinking coffee!

Bart: It's not coffee, it's hot Pepsi!

Homer: They killed Graystache!

Guy: Thanks for the spoiler, big mouth! (throws the book at Homer)

(Bart is staring at Nelson's vest in care, when Nelson rides by on his bike.)

Nelson: Ha-ha! I touched your heart!

Milhouse: Trust me Bart, it's better to walk in on both your parents than on just one of them.

Marge: Bartholomew J. Simpson! How can you be so mean?

Bart: What can you do about it? (Marge whacks him on the head with a spoon.) Hey!

Marge: I'll whack you with the whole salad set if you don't start thinking about others!

Homer: (tucking Lisa into bed) Okay. Tucked in tight, glass of water, night light on, no barn owls, don't do drugs, love you, good night!

Bart: Where is Nelson?

Principal Skinner: I'm sorry. Nelson never woke up.

Bart: What?!

Principal Skinner: Never woke up because he never passed out...he's right over there.

Homer: No man should have to out live his fictional wizard! (sobs)

Martin: Individually we are weak, like a single twig. But as a bundle, we form a mighty faggot.

Bart: Well said!

[After Martin's line, a title appears: ''fag•got (fag´• et) n. a bundle of sticks for fuel. (Fr. fagot, a bundle of sticks)'']

Homer: Time to do what I do best: Lie to a child.