The Regina Monologues



The Regina Monologues" is the fourth episode of The Simpsons fifteenth season, which originally aired November 23, 2003. It was written by John Swartzwelder, and directed by Mark Kirkland. Guest starring Jane Leeves as Edwina and Tony Blair, Evan Marriott, Sir Ian McKellen and J. K. Rowling as themselves. It was the first episode in which the entire family went to England, and the first time a sitting head of government provided his own voice as a guest star.

Plot
Mr Burns withdraws a $1000 bill from an ATM, but he drops it and an updraft carries it away to the Simpsons' house, where Bart and Milhouse are playing a vicious video game (Hockey Dad). It flies straight into Milhouse's hair and Bart removes it and keeps it, claiming that it was a ladybug. Bart wonders what to do with the bill, but Marge tells him and Homer to put up fliers so that the person who lost it can reclaim it. Soon, there is a long line of people outside the Simpsons' house, all claiming the bill. No one can describe it correctly and Lisa suggests that they spend the money on Marge, who wants a vacation, but decides against it because Homer always manages to ruin it. The next day, Bart displays the $1000 bill in school for his friends to see. When Milhouse offers him 25 cents to see it again, he gets an idea and sets up a museum in his tree house, naming it "The Museum of Modern Bart". The museum is a resounding success, however, when Mr. Burns comes in and sees the bill, he claims it as his. When asked for proof of ownership, he shows Bart the bills indentation on his chest (when the bill was ejected from the ATM, it hit Burns in the chest, knocking him backwards before it was swept off). Bart is forced to give it back and close his museum, as now that there is no $1000 bill, no-one is interested in the museum. Lisa says that they have managed to collect $3000 from the museum so it does not matter anymore. Bart wants to spend it on a used Toyota. Lisa then reminds him that Marge has never had an enjoyable vacation. Bart feels upset, looks at Marge and decides to go on a vacation. Grandpa suggests using the money to go to London, where he hopes to meet Edwina once more, a girl he met there during the war.

The family travels to London and are greeted by the then British Prime Minister Tony Blair, whom Homer confuses with Mr. Bean. They start seeing the sights, while Grandpa stays at the hotel, trying to contact Edwina. Bart and Lisa go on a "sugar trip" after discovering the joys of British chocolate. The family go on to meet J.K. Rowling and Sir Ian McKellen.

Marge is astonished that Homer is behaving himself. They rent a Mini Cooper and start to drive around London. Unfortunately, they get stuck on a roundabout. After driving in circles for hours, Homer decides to break out of it, plows straight through the gates of Buckingham Palace and slams into Queen Elizabeth II's horse drawn carriage. Unaware of whom he has just knocked down, he tries to brush the incident under the carpet, but the Scots Guardsmen start beating him with cudgels. Then comes the Changing of the Guard, and the new Scots Guardsmen continue to beat him mercilessly. This supposedly continues until the Queen's mention or when they run out of Guards.

Homer is put on trial for causing harm to the Queen as well as wrecking her carriage. He calls the Queen an impostor, since her luggage is inscribed "H.R.H." which he believes is short for "Henrietta R. Hippo". The Queen, highly offended, demands that he be executed. He is taken away to the Tower of London to await his execution, where it is planned for his head to be stuck on a pike. Near the fireplace in his cell, he prays to "the God of England" and displays the frequent mistaken American impression that British people prefer to use the metric system. His family call him from outside and Lisa tells him that he can use a secret tunnel that Sir Walter Raleigh built. For that, he must push a brick in the fireplace, which he manages on his second attempt (his first attempt failing as he forgot to put out the fire first). However, the tunnel leads straight into the Queen's bedroom. The Queen whistles for her guards and they rush in. Homer pleads with the Queen to find it in her "jewel encrusted heart" to forgive him. Finally, he is allowed to leave England as long as they take Madonna with them to America. Just as they are about to leave, Edwina shows up and meets Grandpa. She introduces them to Abbie, her 58-year-old daughter, who looks and sounds like Homer in drag. Abe cannot bear the thought of having another Homer in his life, so he bolts. However, Homer seems to think that Abbie is quite attractive, perhaps showing signs of Genetic Sexual Attraction.

it had taken eight months of negotiations with tony blair to convince him to be in the cast and to use himself as a voice.

Production
Tony Blair recorded his part for the episode in April 2003. David Beckham was originally sought to guest star in the episode, but it was deemed that he was not famous enough in America and so was not approached. The plot of Homer hitting the Queen's carriage was recycled from a spec script Jean and Reiss wrote for The Golden Girls in which Dorothy Zbornak hit Mother Theresa with her car. This is the final episode written by longtime Simpsons writer John Swartzwelder.


 * The Regina Monologues — The episode title is a pun on Eve Ensler's play; Regina is substituted as the Latin word for Queen.
 * Hertz Rent-a-Car - The Simpsons rent a Mini Cooper from an " 'Ertz" rent-a-car branch. This is a parody of the Hertz corporation.
 * 007 movies — The series is parodied twice: in the scene where former Prime Minister Tony Blair greets the Simpsons, then blasts off on a jetpack à la Thunderball (the 007 theme plays); and in the scene where Homer spots Bart and Lisa from the London Eye, pulls a lever and the whole car detaches from the Eye, before skimming across the River Thames.
 * The Brady Bunch — The first act plot — where Bart happens upon a $1,000 bill and Marge subsequently tells him to advertise for its rightful owner — is inspired by the 1970 episode "The Treasure of Sierra Avenue."
 * British Newspapers - After Homer is arrested and sent to the Tower of London, British tabloid newspapers are seen with various headlines complete with correct typefaces (except The Daily Mail) - center-left tabloid The Mirror, the centre-right broadsheet The Times, the right-wing paper The Daily Mail and the tabloid The Sun . The Times and The Sun are owned by Rupert Murdoch's News Corporation.
 * "The Cherry Orchard" — The play, written by Russian playwright Anton Chekhov, is used as a sly dig at Joe Millionaire, where star Evan Marriott admits he does not have a cherry orchard, much like in the show where he admits he was not a millionaire.
 * "Harry Potter" - When J. K. Rowling is met by the family, Lisa tells her that she shows deep infatuation with the titular character. After asking what would be the ending of the series, Rowling sarcastically replies that the character will grow up and marry Lisa., which is exactly what she wanted to hear.
 * "Macbeth" curse — The old theater superstition is parodied when Sir Ian McKellen is repeatedly injured after Homer repeatedly mentions the name of the Shakespeare play ("What, Macbeth?").
 * Museum of Modern Art — The "Museum of Modern Bart" is an obvious pun.
 * New Zoo Revue — Homer's insistence that The Queen's real name is Henrietta R. Hippo (thanks to the monogram on the Her Royal Highness' night bag although the Queen is "Her Majesty", not "Her Royal Highness") recalls the hippo character on the 1970s children's TV show.
 * National Lampoon's European Vacation — The scene where Homer endlessly circles the roundabout spoofs a similar scene in the 1985 movie, where Clark Griswold keeps driving around the roundabout adjacent to Lambeth Bridge.
 * Partridge Family 2200 A.D. — Bart's "Moon Party" sequence is likely a reference to the 1970s Saturday morning cartoon. Also appearing: Star Wars character R2-D2 (playing the bass).
 * Sir Walter Raleigh - The tunnel leading from the Tower of London to the Queen's bedroom in Buckingham Palace may be a reference to a rumour that Raleigh carried out an affair with the never-married Queen Elizabeth I. This could also be a reference to the Michael Fagan incident, where an unarmed man broke into the Palace and surprised Queen Elizabeth II in her bedroom.
 * Trainspotting — Bart and Lisa run through town on a sugar high as Iggy Pop's "Lust for Life" plays in the background. When Bart and Lisa are running they go by the same route used by Ewan McGregor at the start of the film most notably as they go down the stairs (despite the stairs being in Edinburgh, not London). The scene ends with Maggie crawling across the ceiling of a lolly house and her head spins around like the baby in the withdrawal scene.
 * The scene between Lord Daftwager and his "lover" is a parody of the premise of the musical My Fair Lady.
 * Manchester United midfielder Ryan Giggs is mentioned by Homer when he questions the yellow card given to Giggs.
 * In complimenting his half-sister, Homer says "You make Dame Edna look like a dude". Dame Edna Everage is a famous character of comedian Barry Humphries.
 * Homer sees Led Zeppelin guitarist Jimmy Page from the London Eye and calls him "one of the greatest thieves of American black music ever to walk the Earth," a reference to Led Zeppelin's frequent and frequently sued-over practice of "borrowing" of music, themes and lyrics from American blues music.
 * The line "Feel the drunken wrath of Chuck Shadowski" heard in the Hockey Dads game is a sly reference to Big Chuck Schodowski, a Cleveland TV personality most recently co-host of the Big Chuck and Lil' John show.
 * Trading Places, the two wealthy gentlemen who suggest a wager after meeting Bart and Lisa who are just coming down from there suger high.
 * Judi Dench When the Simpsons are on the tourbus, they go to a restraunt called 'Judi Dench's Fish and Chips.'
 * The cholate shop clerk claims that british chocolate is sweeter than what Bart and Lisa are used to in America. However British chocolate actually contains less suger than the american variety.

Reception
IGN.com named the episode the best of the fifteenth season, saying that "It may not be the best episode ever, but hell if it isn't a lot of fun", as well as calling it "extremely funny" and a "high point for the past few seasons."