Lard of the Dance/Quotes


 * (Homer, complaining that Apu cleaned the hot-dog machine)
 * Homer: Without the grease, all you can taste is the hog anus.




 * Homer: This is where all the hard work, sacrifice and painful scaldings pay off.




 * Homer: I've been muscled out of everything I've ever done, including my muscle-for-hire business.




 * Homer: Alright, son, we're about to embark on our most difficult mission. Let's bow our heads in prayer.
 * (Bart and Homer close their eyes, bow their heads, and clasp their hands)
 * Homer': Dear Lord, I know you're busy, seeing as how you can watch women changing clothes and all that, but if you help us steal this grease tonight, I promise we'll donate half the profits to charity.
 * (Bart looks at Homer)
 * Bart: Dad, he's not stupid.
 * Homer: ...Alright, screw it! Let's roll!




 * (Willie grabs Homer, crawling in the air ducts)
 * Willie: Not so fast, boyo. Well, if it was up to me, I'd let you go...
 * (looks at his fists)
 * ...but the lads have a temper, and they've been drinking all day!''
 * (Willie starts to beat Homer)
 * Homer: Stop pummelling me! It's really painful!
 * Willie: Alright. I'll strangle you for a while!




 * Alex Whitney: Calm down, Lisa. DMY.
 * Lisa: What's DMY?
 * Alex: Don't mess yourself.
 * Lisa: Eeew!
 * Alex: Yeah, that's why we changed it to DMY.




 * Alex: Ooh, which one is the evil one?