Itchy & Scratchy & Marge/Quotes

(Homer and Marge visit the Statue of David exhibit)
 * Homer: Well, there he is. Michelangelo's Dave.
 * Marge: Hmm, David.
 * Homer: Oh.

(Kent Brockman comments on the Statue of David)
 * Kent: Is it a masterpiece? Or just some guy with his pants down?

(Helen Lovejoy and Maude Flanders arrive at Marge’s doorstep)
 * Helen: Get dressed, Marge. You’ve got to lead our protest against this abomination! (Shows Marge a newspaper with the Statue of David on the cover)
 * Marge: Hmm, but that’s Michelangelo’s David. It’s a masterpiece.
 * Helen: (Gasps) It’s filth! It graphically portrays parts of the human body which, practical as they may be, are evil.
 * Marge: But I like that statue.
 * Maude: (Gasps) I told you she was soft on full frontal nudity.

(Homer watches TV)
 * TV Announcer: It's a tool that every home handy man needs. It's a jigsaw. It's a power drill. It's a wood-turning lathe. It's an asphalt spreader. It's 67 tools in one! How much would you pay for a machine that can do all this?
 * Homer: (Very interested) One-thousand dollars!
 * TV Announcer: Oh, don't answer yet.
 * Homer: Oh, sorry.


 * Itchy and Scratchy's New Temporary Opening: They love, and share.

They share and love and share. Love, love, love, Share, share, share. The Itchy and Scratchy Show!


 * Homer: I always knew you'd change the world... for the better.