Home Away from Homer/Quotes


 * Homer [to Flanders]: You wear a bathing suit in the bathtub?
 * Flanders: Yeah! So I can't see my own shrinky-dink!
 * Homer: Makes sense.


 * Flanders: You softcore sophomores took advantage of my trustful nature! And sullied the Internet by putting pornography on it! Get out!


 * Lisa: I feel so much empathy for those villagers. They had to drink their own tears.
 * Bart: I was so bored, I cut the ponytail off of the guy in front of us. (holds it to the back his head) Look at me, I'm a grad student. I'm 30 years old and made $600 last year.
 * Marge: Bart! Don't make fun of grad students. They just made a terrible life choice.


 * Bart: Mom, I don't want to read, it's the weekend.


 * Bart: I know what we can “Ask Jeeves.” Why does he suck?


 * Homer: Don't worry, I'll straighten things out with Coach Clay. We're good buddies. We play this game called who can punch the softest and he always lets me win.


 * Homer: And the best part is stupid Flanders doesn't even know it's happening in his stupid house; hence my nickname, stupid Flanders.


 * Lisa: You've totally humiliated the best friend The Simpsons ever had.
 * Homer: You're right, but you know who the real victim is here? Ned.
 * Lisa: That's what we've been trying to tell you!


 * Lady: Winner of the Romanian Film Festival's Prestigious Golden Bucket...Holy crap, someone's actually calling!


 * Moe: Homer's the one what wised us up to the sexy goings-on.
 * Flanders: Homer, is this true?
 * Homer: Ned, I had no choice. It was just so funny.


 * Homer: Last-diddly-ast? Oh he's gone! And it's all someone's fault!