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I'm Spelling as Fast as I Can
A Star is Born-Again
Mr. Spritz Goes to Washington
Marge: Poor Ned. This is his first Jellyfish Festival alone.
Homer: I know. And it doesn't get any easier from here. There's the Tongue Kiss Festival, Cinco de Ocho, the Hobo Oscars. Days just made for lovers. Not widowers, lovers!

Sara Sloane: It's a nice change from the actors I date. All they want to talk about is their Botox, their Tae-Bo or their XBOX.

Marge: Sara Sloan has been involved with every Tinseltown hunk from Affleck to Zmed.
Bart: Yeah, she's had more stars on her than Lisa's homework. (snaps in Z-formation)

Flanders: Whoa, whoa, whoa. This movie is turning into SpongeBob NoPants.

Rainier Wolfcastle: Sara, Liebchen, take me back. If tears could burst through my muscular ducts I would cry like a baby who was just hit by a hammer.
Sara: Rainier, you're too jealous. You beat up Jon Lovitz because he presented me an award.
Rainier Wolfcastle: Oh, come on. No one misses a handshake that badly.

Lisa: (to Sara) Miss Sloane, how are you handling the change from "La La Land" to "Blah Blah Land"?
Marge: Lisa, Springfield isn't a cultural wasteland. Part of "Stroker Ace" was filmed at our airport.

[During the women's bookclub]
Marge: Today's book is "Bridget Jones's Diary." Now, let's go around the room and analyze why we didn't read it.
Mrs. Krabappel: Cramps.
Agnes Skinner: All my friends are dead.

Flanders: Homer, Sara wants us to have S-E-X.
Homer: Stupid Flanders, I'm not giving you any of my secret moves.
Flanders: Well, I'm not sure I wanna do it. I mean, who will buy the cow when you get the milk for free? You know, the cow being me.
Homer: Flanders, I'm always interested in talking about free milk and if there's cookies involved, so much the better.

Homer: (hearing the Benny Hill chase music) Uh-oh. Here comes Helen Fielding.


Season 13 Season 14 Quotes Season 15
Treehouse of Horror XIIIHow I Spent My Strummer VacationBart vs. Lisa vs. the Third GradeLarge MargeHelter ShelterThe Great Louse DetectiveSpecial EdnaThe Dad Who Knew Too LittleThe Strong Arms of the MaPray AnythingBarting OverI'm Spelling as Fast as I CanA Star is Born-AgainMr. Spritz Goes to WashingtonC.E. D'oh'Scuse Me While I Miss the SkyThree Gays of the CondoDude, Where's My Ranch?Old Yeller-BellyBrake My Wife, PleaseThe Bart of WarMoe Baby Blues
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