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At Long Last Leave |
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- Mayor Quimby: We are here to banish the Simpsons, although we are not pleased to be doing so.
- Chief Wiggum: I am!
- Julius Hibbert: Me, too.
- Hyman Krustofsky: I feel like a kid at Christmas!
- Sideshow Bob: I believe you know my position.
- Mayor Quimby: I know we are all happy! I'm just trying to spare their feelings!
- Cookie Kwan : Those freaks have no feelings! (points at Maggie) Even baby never cries!
- (Maggie looks at the crowd and makes a throat slash gesture)
- Townspeople: She's a freak!
- Cookie: What baby does that?
- Homer: Let her Maggie slice off the tip of your ear and she'll go right to sleep.
- Carl: No.
- Homer: That's not a choice you get to make.
- Homer: If you banish us you will get a 1000 year drought (Raining Storm) I mean a 1000 year flood (Rain stops rainbow comes out) I mean 1000 years of perfect weather.
- Mayor Quimby: Maybe he's {Homer} right. We are jerks.
- Chief Wiggum: You want I should spray some of my Jerk-Off on you? (Holds up a spray-can labeled 'Jerk Off")
- Mayor Quimby: Eh, it's OK.
- Homer: (disguised as Mr. Burns) Excellent.
- Chief Wiggum: It wouldn't be you if you didn't say excellent.
- Homer: Ah, the old homestead. Remember when we moved in (as an impression of The Simpsons shorts version of Homer) And I talked like this?
- Mr. Burns: Well, bye to them. Let's go, Smithers (Burns is actually talking to Mr. Teeny dressed up as Smithers. Mr. Teeny jumps into Burns's arms and they walk away) Getting a little clingy, aren't we? (Mr. Teeny puckers his lips) Oh, alright. (Burns and Mr. Teeny kiss)
- Smithers: (stunned) That's all it took? I just had to ask?
- [Homer and Bart have strapped a rocket engine to a bike]
- Bart: You sure this is a good idea?
- Homer: This is the outlands, boy. Ideas aren't good or bad, they're just free. Power on!
- [Bart turns the engine on. The bike goes fast, but Homer’s head gets sucked into the engine]
- Homer: I was wrong-- there are bad ideas! There are terrible ideas!
- Mayor Quimby: I err, heard everything was going great in your new Eden with one flaw. You lack a corrupt city government.
- Homer: True, true...
- Gary Chalmers: And a school system that teaches to the tests, sneaks the kids the answers, and still fails.
- Sideshow Mel: You can't leave civilization, Marge. Humanity is an inexorable upward march! Or was, until the year 2000...
- Seymour Skinner: I'm sure someone will come back and tell me where they went. If I go inside, they might not find me.
- [Bart turns up in a constructed helicopter and throws Skinner a rope]
- Bart: Aw, come on man. We wouldn't leave you behind.
- Skinner: Bless you boy!
- [Skinner, hanging from the rope, hits the Jebediah Springfield statue]
- Skinner: Ow!
- Bart: Accident! [sees that Skinner is about to collide with a building] Here comes another one!
- Skinner: Ow! Ow! It's nice to be wanted.