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"Bart-Mangled Banner" |
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- Lisa: This whole morning has been wonderful! (Suspicious) Too wonderful…
- Bart: You're right, this is it. They're selling us to be crash-test dummies!
- Lisa: Oh, please let it be Volvo.
- Bart: It's shot day!
- Bart, Maggie, and Lisa: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
- Dr. Hibbert: Welcome to Hell...man Avenue Medical Plaza!
- Marge: Now that wasn't so bad, was it, Bart? You know, sometimes the fear of something gets over you pretty fast...
- (turns to static in the middle)
- Bart: Whoa. Something's wrong. I can't hear!
- Homer: Doctor, perform a diagnosis!
- Dr. Hibbert: Hmmm...I'm afraid the inoculation has swollen his ear holes shut.
- (Dr. Hibbert attempts to inoculate Bart on an amusement park ride, but he injects Drederick Tatum instead)
- Drederick Tatum: (punches Dr. Hibbert) Black on black violence must end! (punches him again) That was for Dr. King!
- (Groundskeeper Willie approaches Bart)
- Willie: I know what you're hiding, lad. Willie's been deaf since the boiler explosion of '88, but I taught myself to read lips.
- Mailman: Morning, Willie!
- Willie: WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT ME MOTHER?! HER FEET STINK BECAUSE SHE WORKS IN MANURE ALL DAY, BUT IT'S STILL THE BEST DAMN STARBUCK'S IN ALL OF GLASGOW!!
- (The Simpsons swim off the prison island. One guard points a shotgun at them. A second guard comes over)
- Guard 2: Hold your fire. That walrus will eat them.
- Guard 1: No, that's the dad.
- Guard 2: But he's eating a seal.
- (shows the family swimming with said seal in Homer's mouth as he gobbles it up)
- (The family is watching a cartoon in the reeducation center)
- U.S. Constitution: Hello! I'm the U.S. Constitution, and I'm over two-hundred years old! But I'm feeling fine! I wish I could say the same for my crazy cousin, Bill O'Rights.
- Bill O'Rights: (With a drunken voice) What did I do? What did I do? (Vomits some papers. Bart and Lisa start laughing)
- Marge: Lisa, That's not funny! You believe in the Bill Of Rights.
- Lisa: (Laughing) I don't know whether it's the lack of sleep, the sodium pentathol, or that it's the only cartoon I've seen in two months, (With a serious voice) But this is what I believe in now.
- Willie: I know what you're hiding, lad. Willie's been deaf since the boiler explosion of '88. But I've taught myself to read lips.
- Postman: Morning, Willie!
- Willie: What did you say about me mother?! For your information, her feet stink cause she works in manure all day, but it's still the best damn Starbucks in Glasgow!