What to Expect When Bart's Expecting
Brick Like Me
Pay Pal
(Homer looks at himself in the mirror and sees the cartoon version of him)
Homer: Marge! Did you replace our regular mirror with a magical mirror from a mystical salesman at a weird store that if we went back to find it it wouldn't be there anymore?
Marge: No.

Krusty: Come back! I'm a clown! I can't afford to look ridiculous!

Bart: Lion blast!

Reverend Lovejoy: Before the world began, there was only table. Then the great constructor scissored open bag one and dumped out the universe. Then came the time of the great sorting. Color to color, Shape to shape, and a pile of just windows and doors. And everything was made of eternal, unchanging acrylonitrile butadiene styrene," or in the common tongue, plastic.
Homer: But, Reverend, what if everything isn't made of plastic? I think there's more to this world.
Reverend Lovejoy: You mean like decals? Well, the Orthodox don't use them, but we're a Reform congregation. (two Lego minifigures glue a decal window to the church)
Homer: No. I mean a place where nothing snaps together and you just can't toss your kids in a dishwasher to clean 'em.
Reverend Lovejoy: Oh, Homer, a place like that could only exist in some kind of magic rock song.
Ned Flanders: Look around-- we live in a perfect world where everything fits together and no one gets hurt.
Moe: Mustache is right.
Homer: But I'm having all these hallucinations. Like right now my hands look like they're these weird wiggly things. I think they have a name, but I can't put my finger on it. (everyone on the church gasps)
Ned Flanders: (to Rod and Todd) Don't look, Boys! (takes off their heads and holds them against his body)
Homer: Wait! You guys see them too?
Grampa: He is a freak!  Take him apart and lose the pieces under the couch!
Marge: Well, I don't find him disgusting. (holds his hand) Oh, boy, that's mushy!
Homer: Come on, Marge. We need real answers, and there's only one place we can get them!
Reverend Lovejoy: (looking at the bible) Let's see, "fingers. Come on, show me something about fingers." (gasps) Bad news, people. Our religion is not true. Sorry about that. Really sorry.

Homer: I wish I lived in Little Springfield, where everything fits together and no one ever gets hurt.

Homer: Kiss My Flat, Plastic Butt, Reality!

Homer: Marge and I will never grow old together and live like fat cats on Social Security. Good Lord, I'll never experience the ultimate reward for a life well lived-- the gentle slumber of death.

Homer: The fact that kids grow up is what makes time with them special.

Comic Book Guy: That robot is made out of Batmobile, Hobbit hole and SpongeBob play sets. That's.. that's mis-set-genation!

Homer: (about the movie) Oh my God, this is terrible! When did they get to killing the children? (crosses his arms)

Season 24 Season 25 Quotes Season 26
HomerlandTreehouse of Horror XXIVFour Regrettings and a FuneralYoloLabor PainsThe Kid is All RightYellow SubterfugeWhite Christmas BluesSteal This EpisodeMarried to the BlobSpecs and the CityDiggsThe Man Who Grew Too MuchThe Winter of His ContentThe War of ArtYou Don't Have to Live Like a RefereeLuca$Days of Future FutureWhat to Expect When Bart's ExpectingBrick Like MePay PalThe Yellow Badge of Cowardge
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