Cookie Kwan

“Stay off the west side!”

―Cookie^[src]

Cookie Kwan is a go-getter in the imploding Springfield real-estate industry, the self-proclaimed "number one on the west side." She is of Asian (possibly Chinese) heritage and has a stereotypical Asian accent, implying she's likely an immigrant. She works at Red Blazer Realty, and considers herself a very eligible bachelorette.

Biography

Cookie was introduced in the episode "Realty Bites" as a cut-throat realtor at Red Blazer Realty. She considered Springfield's "west side" to be her exclusive domain, and bullied all the other realtors, including Marge and Gil to "stay off" of her territory.

She is friends with Lindsey Naegle, and the two are depicted as being quite man-crazy. She once offered to have Homer move to her house.^[2] She once had a relationship with Mayor Quimby and they had a son, but Quimby gave him to one of his bodyguards. She was one of the 37 women filing paternity suits against Quimby.^[3]

Cookie went to Camp Land-A-Man with Marge, Helen Lovejoy, Luann Van Houten, Patty and Selma when she was a child. Marge arranged a date with Homer, but he didn't appear, so Marge left. Cookie told everyone at the camp about it and that Marge was pregnant.^[4]

She rented the apartment to Homer in Waverly Hills.^[5]

She and her cousin Nookie Kwan (number one on the east side) once entered into a relationship with Professor Frink.^[1]

Trivia

Cookie is the main Asian-American character on the show after Akira.
Cookie has a Facebook account and is friends with Mark Zuckerberg.
She is an insectivore.

Gallery

The full image gallery for Cookie Kwan may be viewed at Cookie Kwan/Gallery.

Appearances

Episode – "Realty Bites"
Episode – "She of Little Faith" (Ad seen in church)
Episode – "Large Marge"
Episode – "Mr. Spritz Goes to Washington"
Episode – "'Tis the Fifteenth Season"
Episode – "My Big Fat Geek Wedding"
Episode – "The Way We Weren't"
Episode – "All's Fair in Oven War"
Episode – "She Used to Be My Girl" (flashback)
Episode – "The Last of the Red Hat Mamas"
Episode – "The Monkey Suit"
– The Simpsons Movie
Episode – "Husbands and Knives"
Episode – "Funeral for a Fiend"
Episode – "Take My Life, Please"
Episode – "Wedding for Disaster"
Episode – "In the Name of the Grandfather"
Episode – "The Bob Next Door"
Episode – "Loan-a Lisa" (mention)
Episode – "Waverly Hills 9-0-2-1-D'oh"
Episode – "How the Test Was Won"
Episode – "Chief of Hearts"
Episode – "The Fool Monty"
Episode – "Homer Scissorhands"
Episode – "Moe Goes from Rags to Riches"
Episode – "At Long Last Leave"
Episode – "Ned 'N Edna's Blend"
Episode – "Lisa Goes Gaga"
Episode – "Penny-Wiseguys"
Episode – "A Tree Grows in Springfield"
Episode – "Dark Knight Court"
THOH – "Treehouse of Horror XX"
Episode – "Four Regrettings and a Funeral" (Seen at church and town hall square)
Episode – "White Christmas Blues" (Seen at town square)
Episode – "Married to the Blob" (Seen at Chuck Dukewagon's All American Chow Lounge)
Episode – "Covercraft"
Episode – "Walking Big & Tall"
Episode – "Waiting for Duffman"
Episode – "Halloween of Horror"
THOH – "treehouse of Horror XXVI" (Homerzilla)
Episode – "Love Is in the N2-O2-Ar-CO2-Ne-He-CH4"
Episode – "Gal of Constant Sorrow"
Episode – "Lisa the Veterinarian"
Episode – "Simprovised"
Episode – "Flanders' Ladder" (picture)
Episode – "101 Mitigations"
Episode – "Crystal Blue-Haired Persuasion"
Episode – "Gorillas on the Mast"
Episode – "Marge the Lumberjill" (seen briefly in crowd at school play)
Episode – "Highway to Well"
Episode – "Warrin' Priests (Part Two)"
Episode – "I, Carumbus"
Episode – "Podcast News"
Episode – "A Springfield Summer Christmas for Christmas"
Episode – "Diary Queen"
Episode – "The Star of the Backstage"
Episode – "A Serious Flanders: Part One"
Episode – "A Serious Flanders: Part Two"
Episode – "A Made Maggie" (seen in church)
Episode – "You Won't Believe What This Episode is About - Act Three Will Shock You!"
Episode – "Poorhouse Rock" (seen in church)
Episode – "Habeas Tortoise"
Episode – "One Angry Lisa"
Episode – "Step Brother from the Same Planet" (seen at "upcycling" art market)
Video game – The Simpsons: Tapped Out

The Simpsons: Season Nine
"The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson":	"The Principal and the Pauper":	"Lisa's Sax":	"Treehouse of Horror VIII":	"The Cartridge Family":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Bart Star":	"The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons":	"Lisa the Skeptic":	"Realty Bites":	"Miracle on Evergreen Terrace":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Minor	Absent
"All Singing, All Dancing":	"Bart Carny":	"The Joy of Sect":	"Das Bus":	"The Last Temptation of Krust":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Dumbbell Indemnity":	"Lisa the Simpson":	"This Little Wiggy":	"Simpson Tide":	"The Trouble with Trillions":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Girly Edition":	"Trash of the Titans":	"King of the Hill":	"Lost Our Lisa":	"Natural Born Kissers":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent

Citations

↑ ^1.0 ^1.1 9 minutes into "Love Is in the N2-O2-Ar-CO2-Ne-He-CH4" after yoga scene:
Jonathan Frink (speaking on phone with Homer): Is there such a thing as too much of a good thing?
Cookie: This is my cousin, Nookie Kwan.
Nookie: I'm number one on the east side!
Frink: Oh gay-layvin.
↑ Large Marge
↑ She Used to Be My Girl
↑ The Way We Weren't
↑ Waverly Hills 9-0-2-1-D'oh

Characters voiced by Tress MacNeille

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[Nookie-1] 1.0 ^1.1 9 minutes into "Love Is in the N2-O2-Ar-CO2-Ne-He-CH4" after yoga scene:
Jonathan Frink (speaking on phone with Homer): Is there such a thing as too much of a good thing?
Cookie: This is my cousin, Nookie Kwan.
Nookie: I'm number one on the east side!
Frink: Oh gay-layvin.

[2] Large Marge

[3] She Used to Be My Girl

[4] The Way We Weren't

[5] Waverly Hills 9-0-2-1-D'oh

[1]

[2]

[3]

[4]

[5]