The Saga of Carl
Dangers on a Train
Marge: Our First Anniversary.
Homer: And we're more in love than ever. In your face, people who said it wouldn't last a year!
Grampa: I stand by my wedding toast.
Marge: Let's just enjoy our happiness, Homie. Accidental motherhood is the greatest thing that can happen to a woman. And I think Bart's finally outgrown his misbehavior.

Homer: But somehow our anniversaries didn't get better than that first one on the train.
Lisa: Wait, you named me after a train?
Homer: Yeah, just like we did with Bart. Anyway, this year, I'm gonna recreate our magical first anniversary, ending with a romantic ride on that... (gasping) Why are you taking away the train?
Rafael: I'm afraid no one rides it anymore despite millions in government subsidies. So we're replacing it with something that makes money and sends people to the food court.

Homer: Kids, I've only had three great ideas. marrying your mother, using a hot dog as a straw and this romantic train ride anniversary. Sir, I need this train.
Rafael: Eh, take it home. It's yours.
Lisa: Are you sure Mom is really gonna want a rusted-out kiddie train?
Homer: She won't see it like this. I'll make this train look as beautiful as it did when this mall was young.
Lisa: Aw, Dad, I just got a little twinge in my heart.
Otto: Try this.
Homer: You stay away from my kids unless you're driving them to school!
Otto: So, I'm not babysitting tomorrow night?
Homer: Oh, we're still on for tomorrow night.

Kearney: Hey, lardo, where you going in your lardo car? Lardville?
Homer: There's no such place!

Homer: (singing) I've been working on the railroad-
Marge: Why are you singing that?
Homer: Because it's in the public domain?

Reverend Lovejoy: Trains, they can fix every marriage.
(gets text from his wife that reads "Are U still working on that stupid train?") What the? Happy moment derailed by the bipolar express. . . Ha, none of you heard that.

Ramona: Let's go home and spend a romantic night looking through your computer's browsing history.
Ben: That exists? Oh, boy.

(Bart and Lisa are fighting with pillows but Bart breaks a lamp)
Bart: Mom! Lisa made me break a lamp!
Lisa: Mom! Bart is twisting facts in an Orwellian fashion.
Marge: Can I have one hour of grown-up time where you two aren't tattling on each other or using obscure references?
Lisa: Orwell? Obscure? The author of Animal Farm?
Bart: Grandpa says he was a commie.

Lenny: I'm getting cooked like a cabbage!

Season 23 Season 24 Quotes Season 25
Moonshine RiverTreehouse of Horror XXIIIAdventures in Baby-GettingGone Abie GonePenny-WiseguysA Tree Grows in SpringfieldThe Day the Earth Stood CoolTo Cur, with LoveHomer Goes to Prep SchoolA Test Before TryingChanging of the GuardianLove is a Many-Splintered ThingHardly Kirk-ingGorgeous GrampaBlack-Eyed, PleaseDark Knight CourtWhat Animated Women WantPulpit FrictionWhiskey BusinessThe Fabulous Faker BoyThe Saga of CarlDangers on a Train
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