Dullards to Donuts is a comic story in Simpsons Comics 38. It is also featured in the comic compendium Unchained.
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Synopsis[]
Burns sees that they are spending a fortune on donuts for their employees, and he decides to make his own donuts, which happen to be extremely addictive, and he bankrupts everyone.
Full Story[]
When Smithers sees the bill for the Power Plant, he sees that they are spending a fortune on donuts (precisely $200,000). He is confused, because of Mr. Burns' great money saving plans in the past. He decides to bring it to Mr. Burns' attention. He visits Dr. Olberman, an esteemed scientist. He compares one of his donuts to a regular Lard Lad donut, and it proves very addictive. Burns then states that he won't be able to supply their regular stock of donuts to the employees. Soon, things become very out of hand, employees even doing pony rides to try and gain their precious donuts back. Eventually, Mr. Burns decides to swap out the regular donuts for the super addictive ones. However, now that the donuts are being taken home by the employees, the Kwik-E-Mart has to jack up prices. Meanwhile, Fat Tony is investing in the donut business, particularly Mr. Burns'. Marge investigates further, and gets a court meeting held, where Dr. Olberman explains the effectiveness of the donuts, and Birch Barlow gives a short speech on how much he loves these donuts. Marge starts explaining that they are bankrupting everyone, and the owner of Lard Lad Donuts is about to finish an argument, when the meeting gets interrupted by Fat Tony and his crew, who brings round the donuts for everyone to try. Eventually, everyone is on Mr. Burns' side. However, worker productivity is now down in the plant, due to everyone being too fat. Dr. Olberman makes it so that the donuts will produce less fat, and they give Homer a case of bad breath, but everything else is normal.