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Gary Chalmers

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"SKINNERRRRRR!"
―Superintendent Chalmers' catchphrase
"Aurora Borealis? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized ENTIRELY within your kitchen..?""
―Superintendent Chalmers in "Steamed Hams"

Garibaldi "Gary" Chalmers III, better known as Superintendent Chalmers, is the superintendent of the Springfield Unified School District, which includes Springfield Elementary alongside either seven[6] or 13 other schools.[7]

A quick-tempered school administrator, he is also a survivalist, fisherman, widower, and the father of Shauna Chalmers.

Biography[]

Early life[]

Garibaldi Chalmers III was born around November 22 - December 21 (as he mentions to Skinner that he is a Sagittarius).[8] In Season 16's "Pranksta Rap," his age is specified to be "40-something", likely in his late 40s, meaning he was born around March 18th 1940-1945.[9]

Chalmers originally hails from Utica, New York.[10] He has also mentioned that he comes from Queens, New York; and then moved to Intercourse, Pennsylvania.[11]

In a deleted scene of Wild Barts Can't Be Broken, the kids insinuate that Superintendent Chalmers was born in a Spanish-speaking country and immigrated illegally to the US.[12]

He attended Ball State University in Muncie, Indiana,[13] although an unidentified Simpsons comic states that he went to Louisiana State University.

Childhood[]

Screen Shot 2024-02-13 at 2.47

Chalmers sobbing on Dr. Raufbold during group therapy.

Chalmers's father was a psychologist, who was admirer of real-life behavioral psychologist B. F. Skinner. In his childhood, Chalmers's father put Gary through cruel and unusual psychological experiments, such as forcing him to go through mazes in order to eat breakfast.[14]

These "mazes" were likely operant conditioning chambers (a.k.a. Skinner boxes), invented in the 1930s and typically used to experiment on animals such as birds and lab rats. In "Bull-E", Chalmers recounts these circumstances during group therapy, after being asked by Dr. Raufbold whether he had even been humiliated. Although Gary begins his explanation seriously and uses the word "father", he soon becomes overcome with emotion, regressing and sobbing about his lack of fatherly love before crawling up to embrace Dr. Raufbold with barely intelligible sobs.[14]

Personality[]

Chalmers is a temperamental and whimsical man unfortunately vested with authority. His mood abruptly swings, and he seemingly arbitrarily plays favorites. Bill Oakley expressed fondness for Chalmers's personality, comparing him to Frank Grimes in that both characters seem to "operate in the normal human universe" as opposed to the cartoonish world of Springfield.[15]

Chalmers and bart

Chalmers tutoring Bart Simpson.

Career[]

In his youth, Chalmers was a high school teacher, but was put off the profession after he was beaten up by the fight club thinking it was the "breakfast club."[16] He was coerced back into teaching for a short while decades later, taking Bart Simpson under his wing and managing to get through to the boy where others had failed.[16]

He manages multiple principals within the Springfield district, including principals Skinner,[17] Duggins,[17] Finch (later fired)[17], Principals Weinberg,[18] Sackett,[18] and Hertzfeld-Mastroantonio.[18] The exact number of schools under Chalmers's jurisdiction varies; he once mentions managing a total of eight principals,[6] and in another, Chalmers states he oversees 14 schools.[7] Other supervised schools besides Springfield Elementary include the Springfield Creative Arts Academy[19] and Waverly Hills Elementary School.[20]

Relationship with Principal Skinner and Springfield Elementary School[]

Whacking Day 12

Chalmers highly unamused during "Whacking Day."

While constantly having little to no tolerance for Principal Skinner's well-intentioned mistakes, he shows apathy and dismissiveness of Ned Flanders' absolute lack of discipline during his brief tenure as principal of Springfield Elementary. He has claimed his only reason for constant hostility towards Principal Skinner is that Skinner "really bugs him".

Most times he visits Springfield Elementary, especially in inspections during earlier seasons, some sort of disaster strikes. He produces extreme anxiety in Principal Skinner, who offers increasingly improbable stories to explain what is happening.

Chalmers is known for throwing open doors to rooms and bellowing "SKINNERRRRR!!!" or "SEYMOUR!!!", to which Seymour stammers, "S-Superintendent Chalmers!" His catchphrase has caused some paranoia in Skinner.[21] He claimed to never raise his voice at the other principals he oversees,[6] although he did so to Principals Weinberg, Sackett, and Gwendolyn Hertzfeld-Mastroantonio.[18] On a few occasions, he says Skinner's name (or in some case, words pronounced similarly to "Skinner" such as "Skimmers" or "Dinner")[22] this way when absolutely nothing has gone wrong, implying that he either pronounces Skinner's name this way by habit; does it on purpose to scare him; or is triggered by his childhood trauma regarding psychologist B. F. Skinner - or a combination of all of these.

Chalmers has also, on rare occasions, shown a caring side towards Skinner, when he called out for Skinner and when he had a reply that Skinner was okay, he told Skinner to "Never do that again" (scare him).[23] In "24 Minutes", he is also upset at Skinner misinterpreting his reaction to a bake sale, angrily huffing, "You don't know me at all." Similarly, he had at least some grudging respect for Skinner, as he personally organized the surprise 20th-anniversary celebration of Skinner's time as principal of Springfield Elementary and even made an unscheduled and secret visit to the school specifically to make the announcement before Skinner arrived at the Teacher's Lounge (although he did express annoyance at Skinner's meticulous inspections throughout the school, exclaiming, "Good lord! The rod up that man's butt must have a rod up its butt." after barely arriving at the Teacher's Lounge undetected by Skinner).[24] He also worked with Skinner during the disastrous Edutainment event at Springfield Elementary School, where he and Skinner portrayed Bud Abbot and Lou Costello's respective roles in their famous "Who's on First" comedy routine (although Chalmers eventually snapped at Skinner, walked offstage, and bitterly referred to him as a "sexless freak" after Skinner messed up the routine).[25]

Chalmers' own competence and dedication to his job are questionable. He was once heard complaining about Springfield Elementary and its classrooms full of "ugly, ugly children". He let Ned Flanders allow the school to descend into anarchy when he was principal, freely admitting that he had fired Skinner for far less, explaining simply that "Skinner really bugged me." In fact, the only reason Chalmers even allowed Skinner to be reinstated as Principal at that time was that Ned Flanders introduced prayer into the school (because Chalmers feels that religion should never be placed within school walls, just as facts don't have a place within an organized religion). When asked about Skinner's reinstatement, he said simply, "Ehh, he seems to know the students' names."[26] Another time, in order to placate an angry mob of women after Skinner made a statement that sounded very sexist, Chalmers replaced Skinner with a female principal, Melanie Upfoot, who was undeniably even more gender-biased -- Melanie's first order of business was the segregation of male and female students. Chalmers seems disturbingly unconcerned with the school's decline, saying that "the way America's public schools are sliding, they'll all be like this in a matter of months. I say enjoy it — it's a hell of a toboggan ride!"[27] On another occasion, however, Skinner once told Chalmers that "a caring superintendent" was something the kids of Springfield Elementary certainly did not lack.[6]

On a related note, he was also in on Skinner's attempt at cheating out grant money after it became apparent Lisa had cheated on an important standardized test; Chalmers was completely unconcerned about using unearned grants when Lisa reported Skinner to him. He also promotes people based on personal bias as opposed to actual competence, promoting Principal Holloway (described by Skinner as a "drunk" and Chalmers as a "pill-popper") to assistant superintendent, overlooking the efforts made by Skinner to improve his school's standing.[28]

Personal life[]

Chalmers is a proud owner of a 1979 Honda Accord (and later, a Camry, which Otto Mann promptly wrecks).[29]

As of Season 32's "Diary Queen", he drives a red sedan with a license plate reading "SKIN-NER." He keeps the keys in his sun visor (allowing Bart to steal his car), information Bart learned via reading the late Edna Krabappel's diary.[30]

Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts 63

Chalmers shouting at fish after being terminated.

Relationships[]

Friendships[]

"Livin' La Pura Vida" reveals that Chalmers has befriended the Van Houtens, as he and his daughter are among the few families the Van Houtens invite on their annual Costa Rica trip. Other families include the Hibberts and, for the first time, the Simpsons.

In Season 34's "Habeas Tortoise," Homer knocks on the Chalmers' door due to their house's proximity to the zoo, to gain security-cam footage for his Facebook conspiracy group, "Lost Leonard." After agreeing to share the footage, Chalmers expresses a modest desire to join, and Homer happily welcomes him. He seems to closely befriend the other members of the group: Sideshow Mel, Drederick Tatum, Comic Book Guy, Gil, and Miss Hoover (Homer states that "Those friendless weirdos have become my best weird friends.")[31]

Later that season, in "Girls Just Shauna Have Fun", Chalmers warmly greets Homer as "Simpson!" and invites him to try his home-brewed Trappist beer. This leads to Chalmers training Homer on the history and methods of Belgian Trappist brewing, complete with matching monk costumes. After they collaborate to create their own brew titled "Thirst Trappist Hunky Monks Ale", complete with a logo of the two of them. After nearly facing arrest, Chalmers panics that his superintendent career is over, but a mistake made by Homer leads to their release from arrest. In his relief, Chalmers kisses Homer on the mouth and proclaims him a "glorious idiot."[32]

Dating[]

Chalmers has dated Agnes Skinner, much to Seymour's dismay.[33]

Edna Krabappel sent a carrier pigeon message to her ex-fiancé Seymour that said she and Chalmers were "doing it".[34]

Chalmers told a second-grade class he was dating "one of your mothers. I forget whose."[35]

During "Ae Bonny Romance", while in Scotland for the wedding of Groundskeeper Willie, he is shown romantically holding hands and smiling with lunch lady Doris Freedman.[36] Upon seeing this, Homer Simpson implies that the romance will only last for the duration of the trip.

Bart and chalmers4

Chalmers enthusing Bart, Milhouse, Nelson, Jimbo, and Dolph about an outdoor education. The urn for Rosemary Chalmers is visible.

Late wife[]
Main article: Rosemary Chalmers

Chalmers is a widower, having lost his wife Rosemary Chalmers to an unidentified illness.

In "Pranksta Rap", he worked as a bodyguard for Alcatraaz, dressing in white gangster clothing and telling Skinner to "step off, dog" for the entertainment of the rappers. He then quietly tells Skinner he is aware they are making fun of him, but his wife is "very, very sick."[9] Thereby it can be supposed that he was knowingly embarrassing himself to raise money in an attempt to curse his wife's illness.

By Season 23's "Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts", he has built an urn for Rosemary Chalmers, which is displayed on the mantle of his fireplace.[16]

Chalmers confirms his wife's death in "Bart's Not Dead"; the bullies tease Principal Skinner, asking why he doesn't marry Chalmers if he likes him so much. Skinner responds that, as superintendent, Chalmers is married to all the principals. Chalmers bitterly responds, "Thank you. You've made the anniversary of my wife's death even more depressing."[37]

Chalmers home-brewing beer in his garage, from Girls Just Shauna Have Fun

Chalmers home-brewing beer in his garage, from "Girls Just Shauna Have Fun"

Homer Goes to Prep School 54

Chalmers sharpening a knife among the doomsday preppers.

Beliefs and hobbies[]

Homer Goes to Prep School 58

Chalmers's doomsday-prepped basement. Not visible are 4 automatic rifles.

Chalmers is a survivalist, doomsday prepper, conspiracy theorist, Republican party member, and Presbylutheran.

He enjoys fishing[16] and has competed in at least one fishing competition.[38] Chalmers is also a hobbyist beer brewer; Chalmers has set up an elaborate brewery in his garage in order to home-brew his own Trappist-style beer, drawing inspiration from Belgian Trappist monks. He collaborates with Homer on this venture during "Girls Just Shauna Have Fun".

In "Homer Goes to Prep School" he is a member of the Doomsday Preppers (people who prepare for anarchy, believing the society will collapse at any moment due to an electromagnetic pulse). His basement is stocked with food and other supplies needed to survive the end of society. When Lloyd said that they shouldn't look at the faces of people who didn't prepare, Chalmers shows them a solution to the problem: a rifle scope that makes any human face look dangerous and threatening (by placing angry eyebrows on their faces). In an uncharacteristically low voice, he insinuates that he would feel no remorse shooting anyone, including Maggie. When Lindsay Nagle seems concerned, he blurts out that she probably think he's going mad with power. Near the end of the episode when Lloyd mentions that in the new world he would be a big-shot, Chalmers admits that he and the others were planning to seal Lloyd in a cave. When Lloyd mentions he was going to poison their drinking water, Chalmers proclaims that he will drink his own urine.

Chalmers is also a conspiracy theorist. In "Habeas Tortoise", Homer invites him to join a Facebook group of skeptics desiring to discover the truth behind the zoo's missing tortoise. After joining the group, he feels more and more comfortable to befriend them all and express a variety of conspiratorial beliefs. During the episode's wedding of Gil Gunderson and Elizabeth Hoover, he sings a romantic cover version of Sam Cooke's "Wonderful World," wherein he condemns science textbooks and claims "the virus was caused by 5G".

Springfield Republican Party meeting in The Kid is All Right

Chalmers at a meeting of the Springfield Republican Party alongside Krusty, the Rich Texan, a vampire, Wolfcastle, Burns, and an unidentified character.

In "The Kid is All Right", he is shown to be a member of the Springfield Republican Party, who meet in an ominous tower usually accompanied by a lightning strike. Since he fired Ned for introducing prayer to school in "Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song" and advocated for a government grant to Springfield Elementary School in "Lisa Gets an "A"", he is likely a moderate Republican, in contrast to social conservatives like Ned or economic extremists like Mr. Burns.

In "Daddicus Finch", Chalmers hosts Shauna's Bat Mitzvah at a synagogue; she recites the Scriptures in Hebrew, albeit unenthusiastically, indicating that his daughter is of Jewish heritage. However, Chalmers himself is frequently seen at the First Church of Springfield (including in the Springfield movie),[39] mispronounces meshuggeneh in the same episode, looks unenthusiastic during the Hora, rushes the Rabbi's anecdotes, and has a non-Jewish first and last name. Therefore, he is most likely Presbylutheran like most of Springfield, while Shauna's late mother Rosemary Chalmers was Jewish.[40]

When Springfield began installing surveillance cameras around Springfield and 742 Evergreen Terrace is discovered to be a blind spot, the Simpsons' backyard is transformed into a gathering place for rebellious activity. During the daytime chaos, Superintendent Chalmers swings a pair of nun-chucks while prancing in a frilly dress. Upon being spotted by Ned and Homer, he stops and reacts with shame, explaining, "This used to be just a little part of me."[41]

31x7 Bendy

Gary suggesting that Shauna conserve her phone battery before their trip to Costa Rica.

Family[]

In the episode "How The Test Was Won", Seymour Skinner mentions that Chalmers has a daughter from whom Skinner buys wrapping paper. The next episode "What to Expect When Bart's Expecting" revealed that Shauna is his daughter. He may be considered a caring and empathetic father, showing unconditional emotional support for Shauna during their trip to Costa Rica in "Livin' La Pura Vida".

Shauna blocks him on all social media, but to keep her safe, Chalmers follows her under the alias "Rodrigo," a goth teen from Argentina.[32]

Appearance[]

Chalmers has yellow skin and grey hair; he stipulates that he is bald-ing, not bald.[42] He wears a dark blue suit, a white dress shirt, a red tie, and black shoes.

According to a deleted scene, his blue suit is Armani (he wags a fist and screams, "Damn you, Armani!" when his suit shrinks).[43]

In his youth, he had brown hair with a combover.[16]

Non-Canon Appearances[]

Ssi 5 The contents of this article or section are considered to be non-canon and therefore may not have actually happened/existed.

Future[]

In the episode "Future-Drama", which takes place in the future, the elderly Superintendent Chalmers has undergone significant dementia (because of a stim attack, which was revealed by Skinner). He rides a moped and has severe aphasia to the point of repeating his trademark line constantly while spinning around in a continuously 360-degree circle.

In the episode "Holidays of Future Passed", Superintendent Chalmers is shown to be frozen in the Springfield Cryogenic Facility, along with other elderly characters.

In the episode "Mother and Child Reunion", Chalmers (as Elder Chalmers) makes sexist comments about President Lisa running for state school superintendent, but concedes.

The Simpsons Game[]

Chalmers appears in The Simpsons Game walking around the Towns Square with Lenny Leonard, Krusty the Clown, Charlie (SNPP) Julius Hibbert and Kent Brockman. Later when the Aliens arrive in Springfield, Chalmers tells Edna Krabappel the end may be upon them. Edna agrees and says they should roll around in the hay before they pass on. Chalmers refuses Edna then says "If Seymour ever found out he would be devastated." Chalmers then agreed to roll around in the hay with Edna.

Treehouse of Horror series[]

In the second segment of "Treehouse of Horror XVII", Chalmers asks Skinner to just let the Golem kill him.

In the second segment of "Treehouse of Horror XX", Chalmers is one of the many residents who were turned into zombies.

In the third segment of "Treehouse of Horror XXII", Chalmers (as Mecha-Chalmers) is the main antagonist, playing a character similar to Colonel Miles Quaritch from Avatar. He is a colonel of an army that he leads on the planet Rigel 7 to fight the Rigellians, to get Hillarium, a liquid that makes everything funny. He is defeated after Bart makes Mecha-Chalmers slap himself in a large robot suit that he controls by movement, telling him he had something on his face, thus making Mecha-Chalmers fall off a cliff.

In the opening of "Treehouse of Horror XXVIII", Chalmers is a candy bar called Chalmond Joy.

In "Not It", Chalmers is named "Super-Intense Kid Chalmers".

Family Guy[]

In "Shanksgiving", it is revealed he has a long lost twin brother named Police Superintendent Chalmers.

Behind the Laughter[]

In the DVD commentary to "22 Short Films About Springfield", Simpsons creators noted that Superintendent Chalmers seems to be one of the few "normal" characters on the show, and Chalmers is frequently alone in his awareness of the show's zaniness.

Trivia[]

  • In a deleted scene of Wild Barts Can't Be Broken, the kids insinuate that Superintendent Chalmers should be known as Señor Chalmers due to his alleged immigration fraud. Upon hearing this, he is slapped across the face by Agnes Skinner, and he exclaims, "¡Ay, caramba!"[44]
  • When truly panicking (beyond anger), Chalmers tends to burst into laughter and catastrophize the situation aloud. He does these during his anxiety attack on the plane in "The Road to Cincinnati" and during his arrest in "Girls Just Shauna Have Fun".
  • During the "Steamed Hams" segment of "22 Short Films About Springfield", Chalmers mentions that he is from Utica, New York.
  • His first name was revealed to be Gary in "Yokel Chords".
  • Ralph Wiggum once called him Super Nintendo Chalmers.[45]
  • His surname 'Chalmers' is of Scottish origin, hinting that he is of such descent.
  • He is right-handed.
  • On several occasions, he and Agnes Skinner have tried dating, much to Skinner's discontent.
  • In the Latin American dub, his last name is Archundia in the first seasons.
  • In the Family Guy episode "Shanksgiving", it's revealed that Gary has a twin brother, Police Superintendent Chalmers, who were raised in separate households (PS Chalmers with his mother and Gary Chalmers with his father). Whether this crossover episode counts as canonical is debatable.
  • In "The Heartbroke Kid" Chalmers stated that he's a Sagittarius, and expressed frustration that Skinner didn't know that.
  • In "The Road to Cincinnati", Chalmers is shown to have aerophobia (a fear of flying), for which he takes an unspecified anti-anxiety medication. Upon discovering that Skinner has checked their handbags, he has an anxiety attack onboard, which leads to their banishment from Air Cincinnati.

Gallery[]

Gary Chalmers
The full image gallery for Gary Chalmers may be viewed at Gary Chalmers/Gallery.

Appearances[]

Incomplete This article or section is incomplete.

Please improve the article, or discuss the issue on the talk page.

Citations[]

  1. ↑ Not It
  2. ↑ 24 Minutes
  3. ↑ "Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts
  4. ↑ "Bull-E"
  5. ↑ "What to Expect When Bart's Expecting"
  6. ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 6.3 "You Don't Have to Live Like a Referee"
  7. ↑ 7.0 7.1 "500 Keys"
  8. ↑ "The Heartbroke Kid"
  9. ↑ 9.0 9.1 Pranksta Rap -
    Skinner: Do you think there's a place in the hip-hop world for a forty-something elementary school administrator?
    Alcatraaaz: Hell yes.
    Skinner: Hmm.
    Alcatraaaz: But I'm already payin' a guy for that.
    Superintendent Chalmers: Skinner! I order you to step off, dog. [to Skinner] I think they're making fun of me, but my wife is very sick.
  10. ↑ 22 Short Films About Springfield
  11. ↑ The Old Man and the "C" Student
  12. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKNOqPhiQnk&t=03m14s
  13. ↑ "E-I-E-I-D'oh"
  14. ↑ 14.0 14.1 Bull-E
  15. ↑ Oakley, Bill (2006). The Simpsons The Complete Seventh Season DVD commentary for the episode "22 Short Films About Springfield" (DVD). 20th Century Fox.
  16. ↑ 16.0 16.1 16.2 16.3 16.4 Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts
  17. ↑ 17.0 17.1 17.2 "The Road to Cincinnati"
  18. ↑ 18.0 18.1 18.2 18.3 "Blazed and Confused"
  19. ↑ "Any Given Sundance"
  20. ↑ "Waverly Hills, 9-0-2-1-D'oh"
  21. ↑ Lisa's Date with Density
  22. ↑ Homer and Lisa Exchange Cross Words
  23. ↑ The Debarted
  24. ↑ The Principal and the Pauper
  25. ↑ Marge Simpson in: "Screaming Yellow Honkers"
  26. ↑ Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song
  27. ↑ "Girls Just Want to Have Sums"
  28. ↑ Whacking Day
  29. ↑ "Lisa's Date with Density"
  30. ↑ "Diary Queen"
  31. ↑ "Habeas Tortoise"
  32. ↑ 32.0 32.1 "Girls Just Shauna Have Fun"
  33. ↑ Bart the Fink
  34. ↑ "How Munched is That Birdie in the Window?"
  35. ↑ "Flaming Moe"
  36. ↑ "AE Bonny Romance"
  37. ↑ "Bart's Not Dead"
  38. ↑ "Do the Wrong Thing"
  39. ↑ Jew or Not Jew: Chalmers, 2016.
  40. ↑ Jew or Not Jew: Chalmers, 2018.
  41. ↑ To Surveil With Love
  42. ↑ G.I. D'oh, specifically the balding clip
  43. ↑ https://twitter.com/dailysimpsons/status/1479534771936112640?lang=en
  44. ↑ Wild Barts Can't Be Broken
  45. ↑ Lisa Gets an "A"
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