Grand Theft Scratchy
Medal of Homer

Lisa Simpson

In certain parts of the level

  • When will pimps and gangsters get along?
  • Why did I think Grand Theft Auto is about the bus driver Otto?
  • Why are there no video games about philosophy?
  • I feel fear and liberal guilt!

Attacking enemies

Marge Simpson

In certain parts of the level

  • This place is very violent, why would Bart want to play this game?
  • This town is a lot scarier than wherever Pacman lives.
  • I feel fat. I wonder if they have a curves here?
  • Why can't rappers be more like that Vanilla Ice fellow?

Recruiting members

  • Woof woof! Bark bark!
  • Who's a good mob? Who's a good mob?
  • There's a new Mac Daddy in town: a Mac Mommy!
  • Nag powers: activate!
  • Yo dogs! Let's do this thing!
  • I'm your human master!
  • Attention gangsters: Marge is in charge!
  • Cartoon dogs: obey!
  • Where's my bitches!
  • Time for pimps and hoes to work together!
  • Let's get mobby!

Ordering her mob

  • Break it down with a break down!
  • Break it, I get the receipt.
  • Gentlify!
  • Destroy this non-specific thing!
  • Pop an ass in their caps!
  • Punch with your fists!
  • Unpimp the house!
  • Raise that slum-shack!
  • Put an end to video game violence - literally!
  • Extreme makeover - Marge Edition!

Attacking enemies

  • Way to scourge filth, Lisa!
  • How did mice learn to swear?
  • Step off, fool!
  • If looks would kill, I would be an Uzi!
  • Oh go eat a cheese!
  • Words hurt, you know.
  • I love gangster rap, but I hate gangsters!
  • The only good rap is surround rap!
  • You need to time out.
  • Oh no you didn't!
  • I find your rap music boastful.
  • I don't respond to stink talk.
  • Everything you say bounces off me and sticks to you.
  • Easy on the squares.

Cat Prostitutes

  • He's so mad, I got to have his baby.
  • My pimp's got 100%, that seems fair.
  • If you tell anyone that this is a weave, I'll KILL you!
  • Hoe-down!
  • Wanna party!?
  • I tore my torn stocking!
  • I was Valedictorian..... at Prostitute University!
  • I need my pimp!

Mouse Pimps

  • I am the notorious M.O.U.S.E.
  • Mo' money, mo' problems.
  • Where's my cheese?
  • A pimp's gonna do what a pimp's gotta do.
  • Pimpin' ain't easy.
  • That Larry the Cable Guy cracks me up.
  • I gotta get my baby mama an Escalade.
  • That Condoleezza is fine.
  • You're going down, fool!
  • Dibs on the little annoying one.

Itchy Gangsters

  • I torn my Sean John! (sobs)
  • If you're looking for trouble, you've found it!
  • My AI is smarter than you!
  • How you like me now!
  • That Larry the Cable Guy cracks me up.
  • That was whack!
  • MELEE!
  • Charlie horse! Charlie horse!
  • Okay, no one move - I've lost the contact lens.
  • Death to humans!
  • Let's do this thing!
  • I got pain in my izz-ass!
  • This is better than working in Krusty Burger.
  • Which way did he go, which way did he go?
  • I've been dissed.
  • I broke my cap-poppin' finger!

Scratchy Gangsters

  • Eat death!
  • If you're looking for trouble, you've found it!
  • You know who's great? Loretta Swit.
  • You ain't got no reason to live!
  • God help me, I love to strangle.
  • There's high fructose corn syrup in everything these days.
  • My father never told me he loved me.......yet.
  • The best place to shoot someone? In the back.
  • Kill, kill, kill, kill!
  • You dead, honey.
  • I feel stabby!
  • MELEE!
  • How do you like me now?
  • Stay on target (x2)!
  • This playground just became a slay-ground!
  • I can't believe I never lived without passion.
  • Let's do this thing!
  • Who wants to thumb wrestle?
  • I'm using mom-killer bullets.
  • I don't feel so good.....
  • My nards!
  • Owie-zowie!
  • Aw, FUDGE!
  • Luckily, I'm wasted.
  • Now THAT'S a concussion!
  • Aw, Suge Knight!
  • I like eggs...
  • Now I know pain!
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