- “Scorpio! He'll sting you with his dreams of power and wealth. Beware of Scorpio! His twisted twin obsessions are his plot to rule the world, and his employees' health. He'll welcome you into his lair, like the nobleman welcomes his guest. With free dental care and a stock plan that helps you invest! But beware of his generous pensions, plus three weeks paid vacation each year. And on Fridays the lunchroom serves hot dogs and burgers and beer! He loves German beer!”
- ―Hank Scorpio's theme song
- “I am here to welcome you on behalf of the President of the Globex Corporation. Me!”
- ―First lines
- “On your way out, if you wanna kill somebody, it would help me a lot.”
- ―Hank Scorpio
- “It was either this or a Porsche!”
- ―Hank Scorpio
Hank Scorpio is an evil genius and owner of Globex Corporation, and is one of the most popular and favorite one-time characters on the show.
Scorpio, despite being an evil genius, proved to be an ideal boss, welcoming the Simpson family with a beautiful home and a friendly, relaxed, non-authoritative employer attitude. However, being an evil genius is still his priority, and over the episode, he delivers a video threat to the United Nations, in which he destroys the Queensboro Bridge with a giant satellite laser device, but is annoyed that some of them seemed to think the bridge collapsed on its own. Unlike many super villains, Scorpio does care for the employees who live in his company town, Cypress Creek, even going so far offering his employees health and free dental care (including to life partners) along with regularly scheduled fun runs. Later, he tries to kill Mr. Bont, a secret agent, who cleverly escapes but is tackled by Homer before being rapidly executed in turn by Scorpio's guards. When Homer comes to Scorpio and tells him that he wants to take his family back to Springfield, a battle between Globex and the U.S government is taking place, and Homer sympathizes with him having problems with the government. Though Scorpio says he would like to have Homer stay, he respects Homer's decision, advising Homer to do what he feels is best for his family. He also tells Homer he would do him a favor if he were to kill some people before grabbing a flamethrower and burning several soldiers while laughing sadistically.
Scorpio later succeeds in taking over the East Coast of the United States, seen firstly as a newspaper headline "Supervillain Seizes East Coast" which lands on the Simpsons' doorstep. He sends Homer a letter saying that Project Arcturus could not have succeeded without him, and gives him the Denver Broncos as a gift, though he knew Homer wanted the Dallas Cowboys, he said it was a start. He later invites Homer if he finds himself on the East Coast. The Simpsons never understood that Hank Scorpio is an international criminal.
Scorpio was recognized by the Springfield Wall of Fame as being a philanthropist.
He appears in the Season 8 DVD menu.
In the comic story, "Sandwiches Are Forever", it is revealed that Hank Scorpio was imprisoned in a Turkish prison for trading ray guns. Homer Simpson was thrown into the same cell as he was after trying to sneak a sandwich out of Turkey. After the guards take a bite out of the sandwich and died of food poisoning, Homer and Hank escaped the prison. After escaping, he enlists Homer and his family's help in returning to his old base and reactivating his death ray, but Lisa catches on to Scorpio's true intentions behinds his friendly facade, and sabotages his death ray so that it'll only destroy cheese. Initially frustrated at this, Scorpio then uses his death ray to threaten the Netherlands into making him their new king by threatening to destroy all their national-trademark cheese, he then thanks Homer for his assistance in doing so.
In the comic story, "Lisa Goes to Camp", he has a son often referred to as "Gold Star". His son displays many similar characteristics such as a desire to take over the world. He dresses identically to his father.
In the comic story, "...So You Want To Work for Globex, Huh?", Scorpio gives you a tour of the Globex corporation in first person. Many mishaps happen within your tour, including a giant weasel being released, James Bont attacking Scorpio, and employees trying to kill you.
The Simpsons: Hit & Run
In Level 6, Scorpio was mentioned when Bart buys a supervillain car from Kearney. Kearney mentions that Scorpio had also "CONQUERED THE EAST COAST".
The Simpsons: Tapped Out
Scorpio resumes his quest to take over the world, as usual being a charming and grateful boss. He also has a short quest with Nelson Muntz, informing him that he sees potential for leadership, and Nelson starts to organize his bullying more effectively - which could indirectly call to one of the non-canon futures in the show in which Nelson becomes a crime boss.
Behind the Laughter
Hank Scorpio is a parody of British Billionaire Richard Branson. Scorpio's character parodies evil villains from James Bond movies, especially Ernst Stavro Blofeld. Unlike the Bond villains, however, Scorpio genuinely seems to care about the well-being of his people, even going so far as to have a heart-to-heart talk with Homer about his family's decision to move while in the middle of a battle in Scorpio's lair and giving him the Denver Broncos as thanks for his help, semi-fulfilling Homer's lifelong dream of owning the Dallas Cowboys he told Scorpio earlier.
The entire Hammock Complex routine was heavily ad-libbed by Albert Brooks, which also explained why Homer was unable to follow Hank Scorpio during the routine and only catch up at the end.
He was supposed to be the villain of The Simpsons Movie, but for a multitude of reasons, such as his friendship with Homer, the fact that they wanted a more full-on villain for the movie but Hank is too nice, and the fact that he wouldn't be recognizable to a mainstream audience, this idea was dropped, and he was replaced by Russ Cargill, who coincidentally is also voiced by Albert Brooks.
- Hank has Facebook and appears to be friends with Mark Zuckerberg.
- Homer called him 'Mr. Scorpion' in "You Only Move Twice". Scorpio did not like this very much and does not want to be called 'Mr. Scorpio' either, and suggests that Homer address him as 'Hank'.
- Fans of the Simpsons really wanted Scorpio to come back so he had small cameo in the intro of the episode "500 Keys". Other than the Family Guy episode "The Simpsons Guy", he hasn’t been shown since.
- Episode – "You Only Move Twice"
- Episode – "Take My Life, Please" (on Springfield Wall of Fame)
- Episode – "500 Keys"
- Video game – The Simpsons: Hit & Run (mentioned)
- Video game – The Simpsons: Tapped Out
- Video game – LEGO Dimensions (mentioned)
- Comic story – Sandwiches Are Forever
- Comic story – Lisa Goes to Camp
- Comic story – A Brand New Burns Part One!
- Comic story – A Brand New Burns Part Two!
- Comic story – Springfield is Not Enough!