Horatio McCallister

Horatio Peter McCallister, more known simply as the Sea Captain, is a resident of Springfield. He is always seen holding a corncob pipe and squinting: because he has at least one glass eye - though once he was seen tapping both of his eyes and says he has "two glass eyes." In addition to eye(s), he also has an artificial leg. Owing to his occupation as a sea captain, he also spoke with a Bristolian accent. He was created by the writer Conan O'Brien.

Captaining

Though he admitted he isn't a real captain, Captain McCallister has (incompetently) piloted several vessels. On one occasion, he wrecks a cargo ship full of hot pants (although in that particular case, it wasn't actually his fault: The lighthouse's light had been destroyed by a desperate Homer and when he saw the lighthouse light turn back on, he attempted to correct his course); on another, in a reference to the Exxon Valdez oil spill, he causes an oil spill by crashing his tanker while drunk.

He launches a river raft for Homer, only to have it sink immediately to the bottom. The captain's idea for Mr. Burns' casino involved three ships and fifty "stout men" who would "sail 'round the Horn and return with the finest spices and silk". On several occasions, he acknowledges his incompetence with a depressed, "Arr, I don't know what I'm doin'." Shortly before Mr. Burns blocked out the sun at 3:00 PM, he indicated that he had in fact seen the sun set once at that time while he was sailing in the arctic, but Mr. Burns interrupted him before proceeding to activate the Sun Blocker.

Personal Life

At one time, he tried selling his houseboat to Marge and Homer while they were looking for a new home, and in an obvious nod to Robert Shaw's character in Jaws starts grappling with a shark when it attacks through the floor. He was apparently a Christian, as he had his ship blessed by Reverend Lovejoy until he learned at least three months later that Lovejoy's blessing the ship didn't count as a blessing since during the three months, his minister license was expired.

In The Simpsons Comics 66- Crusin' For A Bruisin' we are introduced to his long-lost wife Tenille.

In "The Way We Weren't" he mentioned that he was the sailing instructor at Camp See-A-Tree and on movie nights he runs the projector. He sails a young Homer across the lake to see a young Marge who is staying at Camp Land-A-Man. In the past he was slimmer and wore a jacket and jeans with a belt instead of a captain’s coat and boots. He also implied that he did plundering as a hobby, although he often was forced to give up his loot to pay his taxes on April 15, causing him to bitterly wonder why he even bothers doing that hobby at all.^[4]

He lives on a houseboat on land as seen in 'Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky.

Restaurant

As an entrepreneur, McCallister is equally incompetent. His restaurant, The Frying Dutchman, is a failing business venture that does not generate enough income to support its owner. He also once used Homer's bad review for his restaurant despite his hatred of it because it covers up the "D" from the health inspection agency nicely.^[5] The captain once appeared as a penniless bum. When seeing Homer and Marge walking Homer's pet lobster at the beach, he approaches them and claims that he runs a "small academy for lobsters." However, when Marge refuses to send the lobster away to "some snobby boarding school," McCallister asks her for spare change instead ^[6].

Relationships

He has never been shown with a girlfriend and, while it's generally believed that he's not gay, he has hinted at the fact that he has engaged in "situational homosexuality" with his fellow sailors. However, McCallister once took a picture of Patty and Selma in the nude, a picture which he claims to need for "those lonely nights at sea"^[7]. He supposedly has at least one son, whom he describes as "the catch of the day" .^[8]

Conception

The Sea Captain was created by former NBC "Late Night" host Conan O'Brien, while he was a writer for The Simpsons. Voiced by Hank Azaria, the character first appeared in 1992 in the episode "New Kid on the Block" episode as the owner of The Frying Dutchman all-you-can-eat seafood restaurant. In that episode, McCallister is sued by Homer for not letting him eat all he could eat. Homer Simpson's visit to the restaurant caused the captain to observe about him, "'Tis no man, 'tis a remorseless eatin' machine!"

Trivia

The Sea Captain's squinty eye and pipe are based on Popeye
The manner in which the Sea Captain speaks is a direct reference to Long John Silver. Ironically, his voice sound, which was a little higher than the Long John Silver from the 1950 Disney movie Treasure Island, would also bare resemblance to the one which were later used by Disney Pirates of the Caribbean characters Mr. Gibbs and, to a lesser extent, Captain Barbossa
The Sea Captain's real name may be derived in part from Captain Horatio Hornblower, the title character of a series of sea-adventure novels by C. S. Forester, or from British naval hero Admiral Horatio Nelson.
In the Simpsons Comics #134 - In the Swim, it's revealed that Agnes Skinner was the Sea Captain's third wife^[9].
His signature is a drawing of sailors crashing against the head of a gigantic whale (à la Moby Dick)
He has a real estate license, and is an expert on house boats.
He is neighbors with Bumblebee Man.^[10]^[11]
In The Simpsons: Tapped Out, his name is misspelled as McCallister.
According to the "Are You A Patty Or A Selma" quiz, the Sea Captain is a Selma.
According to the episode "And Maggie Makes Three", he has at least one child.
According to the episode "In Marge We Trust", he used to own a Game Boy before he dropped it in the ocean.

Appearances

Episode – "New Kid on the Block"
Episode – "Mr. Plow"
Episode – "Lisa's First Word" (flashback)
Episode – "Marge vs. the Monorail"
Episode – "So It's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show"
Episode – "Homer's Barbershop Quartet" (flashback)
Episode – "Bart's Inner Child"
Episode – "Boy-Scoutz 'n the Hood"
Episode – "$pringfield (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)"
Episode – "Homer the Vigilante"
Episode – "Bart's Girlfriend "
Episode – "And Maggie Makes Three"
Episode – "Bart's Comet"
Episode – "Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part One)"
Episode – "Team Homer"
Episode – "Bart the Fink"
Episode – "22 Short Films About Springfield"
Episode – "You Only Move Twice"
Episode – "Bart After Dark"
Episode – "El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer (The Mysterious Voyage of Homer)"
Episode – "In Marge We Trust"
THOH – "Treehouse of Horror VIII"
Episode – "The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons"
Episode – "Realty Bites"
Episode – "Miracle on Evergreen Terrace"
Episode – "Simpson Tide" (deleted scene)
Episode – "Lisa Gets an "A""
Episode – "Homer Simpson in: "Kidney Trouble""
Episode – "I'm with Cupid"
Episode – "The Old Man and the "C" Student"
Episode – "Brother's Little Helper"
Episode – "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?"
Episode – "Eight Misbehavin'"
Episode – "Faith Off"
Episode – "The Mansion Family"
Episode – "Alone Again, Natura-Diddily"
THOH – "Treehouse of Horror XI"
Episode – "A Tale of Two Springfields"
Episode – "Skinner's Sense of Snow"
Episode – "HOMЯ"
Episode – "I'm Goin' to Praiseland"
Episode – "A Hunka Hunka Burns in Love"
Episode – "Sweets and Sour Marge"
Episode – "Half-Decent Proposal"
Episode – "The Bart Wants What It Wants"
Episode – "Tales from the Public Domain"
Episode – "The Bart of War"
Episode – "Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens and Gays"
Episode – "The Way We Weren't"
Episode – "Fat Man and Little Boy"
Episode – "The Wettest Stories Ever Told"
Episode – "Regarding Margie"
Episode – "Jazzy and the Pussycats"
THOH – "Treehouse of Horror XVII"
Episode – "G.I. (Annoyed Grunt)"
Episode – "Ice Cream of Margie (with the Light Blue Hair)"
Episode – "The Haw-Hawed Couple"
Episode – "'Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky"
Episode – "Little Big Girl"
Episode – "Yokel Chords"
Episode – "The Boys of Bummer"
Episode – "Midnight Towboy"
Episode – "Papa Don't Leech"
Episode – "Wedding for Disaster"
THOH – "Treehouse of Horror XX"
Episode – "Donnie Fatso"
Episode – "Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts"
Episode – "Exit Through the Kwik-E-Mart"
Episode – "Gorgeous Grampa"
Episode – "Dark Knight Court"
Episode – "Pulpit Friction"
Episode – "The Fabulous Faker Boy"
Episode – "Days of Future Future" (The Gilded Truffle)
Episode – "Brick Like Me" (First Church of Springfield)
Episode – "The Simpsons Guy" (cameo)
Episode – "Walking Big & Tall"
Episode – "Sky Police"
Episode – "The Kids Are All Fight" (Picture)
Episode – "Halloween of Horror"
Episode – "Paths of Glory"
Episode – "Gal of Constant Sorrow"
Episode – "Lisa the Veterinarian"
Episode – "Simprovised"
Episode – "The Serfsons"
Episode – "Gone Boy"
Episode – "Gorillas on the Mast"
Episode – "Marge the Lumberjill"
Episode – "Bobby, It's Cold Outside"
Episode – "The Miseducation of Lisa Simpson"
Episode – "Frinkcoin"
Episode – "Warrin' Priests (Part One)"
Episode – "Warrin' Priests (Part Two)"
Episode – "Podcast News" (seen in crowd)
Episode – "A Springfield Summer Christmas for Christmas"
Episode – "A Serious Flanders: Part Two"
– The Simpsons Movie
Video game – The Simpsons Road Rage
Video game – The Simpsons: Hit and Run
Video game – The Simpsons Game
Video game – The Simpsons: Tapped Out
Commercials – Hard Times

Comic story – Mutiny on the Barty

The Simpsons: Season Four
"Kamp Krusty":	"A Streetcar Named Marge":	"Homer the Heretic":	"Lisa the Beauty Queen":	"Treehouse of Horror III":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Itchy & Scratchy: The Movie":	"Marge Gets a Job":	"New Kid on the Block":	"Mr. Plow":	"Lisa's First Word":
Absent	Absent	Major	Minor	Minor
"Homer's Triple Bypass":	"Marge vs. the Monorail":	"Selma's Choice":	"Brother from the Same Planet":	"I Love Lisa":
Absent	Minor	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Duffless":	"Last Exit to Springfield":	"So It's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show":	"The Front":	"Whacking Day":
Absent	Absent	Minor	Absent	Absent
"Marge in Chains":	"Krusty Gets Kancelled":
Absent	Absent

The Simpsons: Season Five
"Homer's Barbershop Quartet":	"Cape Feare":	"Homer Goes to College":	"Rosebud":	"Treehouse of Horror IV":
Minor	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Marge on the Lam":	"Bart's Inner Child":	"Boy-Scoutz 'n the Hood":	"The Last Temptation of Homer":	"$pringfield (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)":
Absent	Minor	Minor	Absent	Minor
"Homer the Vigilante":	"Bart Gets Famous":	"Homer and Apu":	"Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy":	"Deep Space Homer":
Minor	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Homer Loves Flanders":	"Bart Gets an Elephant":	"Burns' Heir":	"Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song":	"The Boy Who Knew Too Much":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Lady Bouvier's Lover":	"Secrets of a Successful Marriage":
Absent	Cameo

The Simpsons: Season Six
"Bart of Darkness":	"Lisa's Rival":	"Another Simpsons Clip Show":	"Itchy & Scratchy Land":	"Sideshow Bob Roberts":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Treehouse of Horror V":	"Bart's Girlfriend":	"Lisa on Ice":	"Homer Badman":	"Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy":
Absent	Minor	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Fear of Flying":	"Homer the Great":	"And Maggie Makes Three":	"Bart's Comet":	"Homie the Clown":
Absent	Absent	Minor	Minor	Absent
"Bart vs. Australia":	"Homer vs. Patty and Selma":	"A Star is Burns":	"Lisa's Wedding":	"Two Dozen and One Greyhounds":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"The PTA Disbands":	"'Round Springfield":	"The Springfield Connection":	"Lemon of Troy":	"Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part One)":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Minor

The Simpsons: Season Seven
"Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part Two)":	"Radioactive Man":	"Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily":	"Bart Sells His Soul":	"Lisa the Vegetarian":
Cameo	Absent	Absent	Cameo	Absent
"Treehouse of Horror VI":	"King-Size Homer":	"Mother Simpson":	"Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming":	"The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Marge Be Not Proud":	"Team Homer":	"Two Bad Neighbors":	"Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield":	"Bart the Fink":
Absent	Minor	Absent	Absent	Minor
"Lisa The Iconoclast":	"Homer The Smithers":	"The Day The Violence Died":	"A Fish Called Selma":	"Bart on the Road":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"22 Short Films About Springfield":	"Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in "The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"":	"Much Apu About Nothing":	"Homerpalooza":	"Summer of 4 Ft. 2":
Minor	Absent	Cameo	Absent	Absent

The Simpsons: Season Eight
"Treehouse of Horror VII":	"You Only Move Twice":	"The Homer They Fall":	"Burns, Baby Burns":	"Bart After Dark":
Absent	Minor	Absent	Absent	Minor
"A Milhouse Divided":	"Lisa's Date with Density":	"Hurricane Neddy":	"El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer (The Mysterious Voyage of Homer)":	"The Springfield Files":
Absent	Cameo	Cameo	Minor	Absent
"The Twisted World of Marge Simpson":	"Mountain of Madness":	"Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(Annoyed Grunt)cious":	"The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show":	"Homer's Phobia":
Absent	Absent	Cameo	Absent	Absent
"Brother from Another Series":	"My Sister, My Sitter":	"Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment":	"Grade School Confidential":	"The Canine Mutiny":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"The Old Man and the Lisa":	"In Marge We Trust":	"Homer's Enemy":	"The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase":	"The Secret War of Lisa Simpson":
Absent	Minor	Absent	Minor	Absent

The Simpsons: Season Nine
"The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson":	"The Principal and the Pauper":	"Lisa's Sax":	"Treehouse of Horror VIII":	"The Cartridge Family":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Minor	Absent
"Bart Star":	"The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons":	"Lisa the Skeptic":	"Realty Bites":	"Miracle on Evergreen Terrace":
Absent	Minor	Absent	Minor	Minor
"All Singing, All Dancing":	"Bart Carny":	"The Joy of Sect":	"Das Bus":	"The Last Temptation of Krust":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Dumbbell Indemnity":	"Lisa the Simpson":	"This Little Wiggy":	"Simpson Tide":	"The Trouble with Trillions":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Cameo	Minor
"Girly Edition":	"Trash of the Titans":	"King of the Hill":	"Lost Our Lisa":	"Natural Born Kissers":
Absent	Cameo	Absent	Absent	Absent

The Simpsons: Season Ten
"Lard of the Dance":	"The Wizard of Evergreen Terrace":	"Bart the Mother":	"Treehouse of Horror IX":	"When You Dish Upon a Star":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Cameo	Minor
"D'oh-in' in the Wind":	"Lisa Gets an "A"":	"Homer Simpson in: "Kidney Trouble"":	"Mayored to the Mob":	"Viva Ned Flanders":
Absent	Minor	Minor	Absent	Cameo
"Wild Barts Can't Be Broken":	"Sunday, Cruddy Sunday":	"Homer to the Max":	"I'm with Cupid":	"Marge Simpson in: "Screaming Yellow Honkers"":
Cameo	Cameo	Absent	Minor	Absent
"Make Room for Lisa":	"Maximum Homerdrive":	"Simpsons Bible Stories":	"Mom and Pop Art":	"The Old Man and the "C" Student":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Minor
"Monty Can't Buy Me Love":	"They Saved Lisa's Brain":	"Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo":
Absent	Cameo	Absent

The Simpsons: Season Eleven
"Beyond Blunderdome":	"Brother's Little Helper":	"Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?":	"Treehouse of Horror X":	"E-I-E-I-D'oh":
Cameo	Minor	Minor	Cameo	Absent
"Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder":	"Eight Misbehavin'":	"Take My Wife, Sleaze":	"Grift of the Magi":	"Little Big Mom":
Cameo	Voice only	Absent	Absent	Absent
"Faith Off":	"The Mansion Family":	"Saddlesore Galactica":	"Alone Again, Natura-Diddily":	"Missionary: Impossible":
Minor	Minor	Absent	Minor	Absent
"Pygmoelian":	"Bart to the Future":	"Days of Wine and D'oh'ses":	"Kill the Alligator and Run":	"Last Tap Dance in Springfield":
Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent	Absent
"It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge":	"Behind the Laughter":
Absent	Absent

Gallery

The full image gallery for Horatio McCallister may be viewed at Horatio McCallister/Gallery.

Citations

↑ Simpsons Comics 216
↑ Simpsons Comics 66
↑ The Simpsons: Tapped Out quest - Play-Annoyed Grunt Pt. 2
↑ The Trouble with Trillions
↑ "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?"
↑ "Lisa Gets an "A""
↑ "Bart's Inner Child"
↑ "And Maggie Makes Three"
↑ Simpsons Comics #134 - In the Swim
↑ The Simpsons Movie
↑ Robot Chicken couch gag

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[1] Simpsons Comics 216

[2] Simpsons Comics 66

[3] The Simpsons: Tapped Out quest - Play-Annoyed Grunt Pt. 2

[4] The Trouble with Trillions

[5] "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?"

[6] "Lisa Gets an "A""

[7] "Bart's Inner Child"

[8] "And Maggie Makes Three"

[9] Simpsons Comics #134 - In the Swim

[10] The Simpsons Movie

[11] Robot Chicken couch gag

[3]

[1]

[2]

[4]

[5]

[6]

[7]

[8]

[9]

[10]

[11]