| “ | Do you find something comical about my appearance when I am driving my automobile? | „ |
| ~ Ian the Very Tall Man |
Ian is a man who goes around humbling bullies because he got bullied from second grade to high school.
At the age of 18 he was 8' 4" (2.53 meters) tall but currently he is 8' 2" (2.50 meters).
Biography[]
Ian is an extremely tall man who drives a Volkswagen Beetle and once taught Nelson a lesson when the bully was walking around town taunting people. After Nelson laughed at him for looking so comical (with his large, lanky frame squeezed into his small VW), Ian proceeded to get out of his car to chase Nelson and pull him out of the sewer when Lisa Simpson revealed to Ian of Nelson's hiding in the sewer, pull down Nelson's pants and made him walk in his underpants, and point it out to everyone so they could laugh at him. Ian made Nelson walk through the streets, waving and blowing kisses to the onlookers as Ian drove behind him as well Bart and Milhouse spilled ketchup and mustard at Nelson.[1]
Ian is known to work in some capacity for Roger Meyers Jr. at Krustylu Studios. He is seen in the recording booth and may be either a writer or animator or both things.
Ian was also seen on a bus to New York where Homer mistakes Ian's legs with his legs and hits them before Marge tells him that those are not his legs. [2]
He shops at Royal Majesty for the Obese or Gangly Gentleman.
Quotes[]
- Ian: Do you find something comical about my appearance when I am driving my automobile?
- Ian: Everyone needs to drive a vehicle, even the very tall. [points to his Beetle] This was the largest auto I could afford. Should I therefore be made the subject of fun?
- Ian: [Clears his throat] Would you like it if I laughed at YOUR misfortune, huh? Maybe we should find out!
- Ian: [Pulls down Nelson's pants which exposes his underwear and commands him to walk down the main street] Nowwww march!
- Ian: [Honks his car horn while driving behind Nelson] Hey, everyone! Look at this; it's that boy who laughs at everyone! Let's laugh at him!
- Ian: Wave to the people!
- Ian: Blow them kisses!
Gallery[]
Trivia[]
- He is a caricature of writer Ian Maxtone-Graham, who is 6′ 8″ tall. They also share their first name.
- He resembles Don Koehler as they are both about the same height and also wear glasses, with a similar hairstyle.
- According to Ian, the reason why he drives a small car like a Volkswagen Beetle is because it was the largest car he could afford to get.
Appearances[]
Episode – "22 Short Films About Springfield" - Episode – "The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show"
- Episode – "The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson"
- Episode – "Moe'N'a Lisa" (name written down)
- – The Simpsons Movie
- Episode – "A Midsummer's Nice Dream"
- THOH – "Treehouse of Horror VIII"
- Episode – "Ned 'N Edna's Blend"
- Episode – "Monty Burns' Fleeing Circus" (Couch Gag)
- Episode – "Looking for Mr. Goodbart"
- Episode – "Homer's Adventures Through the Windshield Glass" (couch gag)
- Episode – "Full Heart, Empty Pool"
- Book – The Simpsons Guide to Springfield
- Video game – The Simpsons: Tapped Out
| The Simpsons: Season Seven | ||||
| "Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part Two)": | "Radioactive Man": | "Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily": | "Bart Sells His Soul": | "Lisa the Vegetarian": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "Treehouse of Horror VI": | "King-Size Homer": | "Mother Simpson": | "Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming": | "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "Marge Be Not Proud": | "Team Homer": | "Two Bad Neighbors": | "Scenes from the Class Struggle in Springfield": | "Bart the Fink": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "Lisa The Iconoclast": | "Homer The Smithers": | "The Day The Violence Died": | "A Fish Called Selma": | "Bart on the Road": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "22 Short Films About Springfield": | "Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in "The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"": | "Much Apu About Nothing": | "Homerpalooza": | "Summer of 4 Ft. 2": |
| Minor | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| The Simpsons: Season Eight | ||||
| "Treehouse of Horror VII": | "You Only Move Twice": | "The Homer They Fall": | "Burns, Baby Burns": | "Bart After Dark": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "A Milhouse Divided": | "Lisa's Date with Density": | "Hurricane Neddy": | "El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer (The Mysterious Voyage of Homer)": | "The Springfield Files": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "The Twisted World of Marge Simpson": | "Mountain of Madness": | "Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(Annoyed Grunt)cious": | "The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show": | "Homer's Phobia": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Cameo | Absent |
| "Brother from Another Series": | "My Sister, My Sitter": | "Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment": | "Grade School Confidential": | "The Canine Mutiny": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "The Old Man and the Lisa": | "In Marge We Trust": | "Homer's Enemy": | "The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase": | "The Secret War of Lisa Simpson": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| The Simpsons: Season Nine | ||||
| "The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson": | "The Principal and the Pauper": | "Lisa's Sax": | "Treehouse of Horror VIII": | "The Cartridge Family": |
| Minor | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "Bart Star": | "The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons": | "Lisa the Skeptic": | "Realty Bites": | "Miracle on Evergreen Terrace": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "All Singing, All Dancing": | "Bart Carny": | "The Joy of Sect": | "Das Bus": | "The Last Temptation of Krust": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "Dumbbell Indemnity": | "Lisa the Simpson": | "This Little Wiggy": | "Simpson Tide": | "The Trouble with Trillions": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |
| "Girly Edition": | "Trash of the Titans": | "King of the Hill": | "Lost Our Lisa": | "Natural Born Kissers": |
| Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent | Absent |