Kamp Krusty Theme Song

Kamp Krusty Theme Song is the anthem of the summer camp of the same name in the episode of the same name. The music was written by Alf Clausen, and the lyrics collectively by Al Jean, Jay Kogen, Mike Reiss, and Wallace Wolodarsky. There are two versions of the song. One is the original version heard on the show, which appears as the thirty-third track on the album Go Simpsonic with The Simpsons, and the other has more lyrics and goes by the name of Hail to Thee, Kamp Krusty and appears as the tenth track on The Yellow Album. The song returned in the Season 28 episode Kamp Krustier, but only the first line of the chorus is heard ("Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty").

Lyrics

Original version

Counselor:

All right, you balls of pan drippings! I wanna see Crisco coming outta those pores! We're not leaving until this Christmas HAM gives me a pull-up!

Campers:

Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty,

By the shores of Big Snake Lake.

Though your swings are rusty,

We know they'll never break.

Kearney:

LOUDER! FASTER!

Campers:

From your gleaming mess hall

To your hallowed baseball field

To your spic 'n' spam infirmary

Where all our wounds are healed.

Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty,

Below Mt. Avalanche.

We will always love Kamp Krusty...

A registered trademark of the Krusty Korporation. All rights reserved.

Yellow Album version

Krusty:

Hi, everybody! I'm Krusty the Clown! (goofy laugh) And I'd like to welcome the parents and/or the closest living relative to Kamp Krusty on Parents and/or the Closest Living Relative Day! We're gonna begin by singing the Kamp Krusty Song and then later, as a treat, some of the specially selected campers (ones who can sing) will sing it in their own special way. Take it away, maestro! (goofy laugh)

Krusty and Campers

Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty,

By the shores of Big Snake Lake.

Though your swings are rusty,

We know they'll never break.

From your gleaming mess hall

To your hallowed baseball field

And your spic 'n' span infirmary

Where all our wounds are healed.

Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty,

Below Mt. Avalanche.

We will always love Kamp Krusty...

Bart:

Let's rock this party! Come on, Otto Mann!

(the song switches to the riffs of Jimi Hendrix's song "Purple Haze")

Otto:

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Heh-heh-heh! Yeah! Woah!

Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty,

I'm the transportation dude.

I got the gig when they saw my sign,

It said, "I will work for food!"

So, hail! Yeah, hail! Alright, hail!

Take it away, little Lisa.

(the song switches to a jazz version)

Lisa:

Hail to thee, Kamp Krusty,

With your frequent moose attacks.

There are skunks in half the bunks

But at least I've got my sax.

And I'd like to play.

(plays saxophone)

Okay, Martin, dazzle 'em.

(the song becomes a Baroque-esque song with a harpsichord playing)

Martin Prince:

A pox on thee, Kamp Krusty!

I came here to lose weight!

O fate most cruel, they fed me gruel

And stuff that looks like bait.

(gasps)

And a pox on thee, Clown Krusty!

Your behavior gives us pause.

Your heart is hard, you have no regard

For the state's child labor laws!

A pox on thee, Kamp Krusty!

We are yearning to be free!

We will ne'er return to Krusty!

Bart:

Aw, put a lid on it, Martin, let's rock this camp!

(the song becomes a rock song)

I HATE IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

CAN'T STAND IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

LET'S BURN IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

LET'S FRY IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

DON'T TRY IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

ELECTROCUTE IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

LET'S DO IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

ANNIHILATE IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

REGURGITATE IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

REFUTE IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

THEN BOOT IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

I HATE IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

CAN'T STAND IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

Bart:

DISBAND IT!

Campers:

KAMP KRUSTY!!

(guitar solo until song fades)