Squeaky-voiced Teen: (punches Bart in the face) Stop stealing golf balls from the driving range!
(The doorbell rings)
Deliveryman #2: (through the door) Homer Simpson! I've got a uh.. special delivery for you.
Bart: Go away.
Deliveryman #2: If you do not open the door, Mr. Simpson, I cannot give you your special delivery.
(Bart sees it's his animation cell that he ordered)
Deliveryman #2: Here's your special delivery.
Deliveryman #2: (punches Bart in the face) And that's for keeping me waiting.
Homer: Well, I'm opposed to the whole thing! Damn opposed!
Bart: He's damn opposed! Damn damn damn opposed!
Bart: You know, Grandma really likes it when her boyfriends are nice to me. She especially likes it when they give me money.
Homer: Maggie, can you point to the monkey? [Maggie points at Homer] Pfft, what do babies know.
Lisa: Maggie, can you point to the credenza? [Maggie correctly points at the credenza]
Marge: Homer, you didn't do a very good job frosting Maggie's birthday cake.
Homer: What, it's not Magaggie's birthday? [pauses and looks at the incorrectly-frosted cake] Oh. [removes the extra A and G, followed by the other letters in "MAGAGGIE", and eats them]
Marge: Hey, hey, hey! Stop it! I made a special cake for you to ruin. It's over there. [points at a cake covered in various letters]
Homer: Ooh. [starts removing and eating the letters]
Patty: Hello everyone except Homer.
(Matlock gets a defibrillator used on him)
Jasper: What's the matter, Abe? All week you were talking about meeting Matlock, now you've met him, swiped his pills...
(An ambulance drives past)
Homer: If he marries your mother, Marge, we'll be brother and sister! And our kids will be horrible freak things with pink skin, no overbites, and five fingers on each hand! [imagines Bart, Lisa and Maggie turning from yellow "monsters" to white humans.]