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King of the Hill
Lost Our Lisa
Natural Born Kissers
Lisa: (to Homer) Are you sure you don't want to go to the doctor? I mean, a drawbridge did close on your head.
Homer: Naw, I'll just walk it off. (he also has tire tracks on his head from cars driving over it)

Marge: (seeing a boy at the hospital with a faucet sticking out of his forehead) See, Bart? There's another little boy who played with glue.
Boy's Mother: Actually, it was a plumbing explosion.
Marge: (to Bart, after the other boy and his mother leave) That's the kind of faucet I want for your bathroom.

Lisa: Wait! You promised to take me to the museum!
Marge: I know, honey, but this is a very unusual situation. At least it would be for most families.

Milhouse: Hey Bart, what's your favorite thing about teacher conference day?
Bart: Hmm... I guess that we don't have to go to school.
Milhouse: Wow! Mine too!

Bart: Hey Lis, I'm sorry I ruined your Egyptian thing. We're still buds, right!?
(no response; the scene cuts to inside Lisa's room which, unknown to Bart or Marge, is empty)
Okay, be that way, be a big stupid jerk. Oh, you're not the jerk... I am. Forgive me? Oh, like you're Miss Perfect! Mom, Lisa's making me feel bad!
Marge: (from downstairs) Stop it, Lisa!
Bart: That shut her up.

Lisa: Stupid bus can't even go to the stupid place it's supposed to stupid go!

Homer: I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman!

Marge: (to Lisa) In a few years, when you're old enough to drive, then you can take the bus!

Homer: Could you open the window? The cops have Daddy's prints on file.

Homer: Lisa, you can't go this far and then not go further!

Lisa: Hmm, I didn't know Springfield had a Russian district. (approaches two men playing chess) Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to the museum?
Man #1: С удовольствием! Это шесть футов в этом направлении! (My pleasure. It's six blocks that way.)
(Lisa runs away)
Man #1: Эй, она пошла не в ту сторону. (Hey, she went the wrong way.)
Man #2: Шах и мат. (Checkmate.)
Man #1: (tosses the chess board to the side) Хорошая игра! Как насчет ещё одной? (Good game. How about another?)

Lenny: You sent your little girl downtown on a bus?
Carl: Alone?
Homer: Maaaaaybe... But you don't know Lisa. I mean, she's so smart, they hooked her up to a big computer to try to teach it some things, but she had so much knowledge, it overloaded and then it got really hot and caught on fire!
Carl: That never, ah, happened, did it, Homer?
Homer: Ah, yes, but now I have to leave on a totally unrelated matter.
(gets up to leave the cafeteria; halfway to the exit, he drops his tray to the ground and runs off screaming) Lisa!

Lisa: But it's the last day of the Isis exhibit!
Bart: Well, you should have thought of that before I glued all this stuff to my face.

Lisa: (on the bus stop) Ah, the old number twenty-two. Clean reliable public transportation. The chariot of the people. The ride of choice of poor and very poor alike. Sure, some folks prefer...
Moe: Uh, are you getting on this next bus, kid?
Lisa: Yes!
Moe: (whistles) Taxi! (a taxi stops and he enters on it) V.D. Clinic. (the taxi drives off)


Season 8 Season 9 Quotes Season 10
The City of New York vs. Homer SimpsonThe Principal and the PauperLisa's SaxTreehouse of Horror VIIIThe Cartridge FamilyBart StarThe Two Mrs. NahasapeemapetilonsLisa the SkepticRealty BitesMiracle on Evergreen TerraceAll Singing, All DancingBart CarnyThe Joy of SectDas BusThe Last Temptation of KrustDumbbell IndemnityLisa the SimpsonThis Little WiggySimpson TideThe Trouble with TrillionsGirly EditionTrash of the TitansKing of the HillLost Our LisaNatural Born Kissers
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