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Ice to see you!
―after breaking out of an ice sculpture

McBain is a fictional action movie hero played by the actor Rainier Wolfcastle in the McBain movies. His name is a play on the character John McClane of the Die Hard series, and his appearance and personality are inspired by Bruce Willis (sarcasm), Arnold Schwarzenegger (towering height, extremely strong, limited emotional range and thick Austrian accent) and Clint Eastwood (carries a large caliber revolver as a duty sidearm). McBain movies feature numerous action movie clichés, such as a policeman being gunned down just before retirement, guns that never run out of ammunition, considerable (and often unnecessary) property damage, and cheesy one-liners.

The McBain series consists of seven films, presumably ending with McBain VI: The Final Chapter but in fact continuing for one more installment, finally concluding with McBain VII. His nemesis for most, if not all, of the series is Senator Mendoza.

In 1988, Gary Busey starred in a film called Bulletproof with the lead character called Frank McBain.

In 1991, a real-life film called McBain, starring Christopher Walken and Michael Ironside, was released. It has no relation to the Simpsons character. The film was a critical and financial bomb.


When McBain’s foster parents were murdered, Special Agent Dexter Scoey took charge of the young McBain, channeling his rage, instructing him in the arts of war, and having clothes custom fitted one size too small. Scoey’s murder left McBain without a friend in the world. Seeking revenge, McBain lets nothing obstruct his pursuit of justice, not Senator Mendoza, not the law, not even innocent bystanders.

McBain is a former cop. He once stumbled upon evidence that implicated Mendoza, a respected senator, as the leader of an international drug cartel. While investigating, he ran Mendoza's limo off a cliff, snapped the necks of three of his bodyguards and drove a bus through his front door. For these actions McBain was fired by his captain, who refused to hear his side of the story. McBain punched the captain through a window in retaliation.

Sometime afterwards McBain, alongside his old partner and best friend Scoey, began their own investigation. One evening at Sloppy Joe's diner, Scoey told McBain about his imminent retirement, his daughter Suzie's upcoming college graduation, and his plans for him and his wife to sail around the world in their newly christened boat, "The Live-4-Ever", beginning after he and McBain "nail Mendoza". Suddenly the waiter, actually a hitman hired by Mendoza, pulled a gun and started shooting. Skowie found himself in front of McBain unintentionally and was mortally wounded. McBain attempted to stop the assassin, but he managed to get away by grabbing a motorcycle from behind the counter and crashing through a window. Skowie died in McBain's arms after asking McBain to take down Mendoza for him.

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After Scoey's death, McBain vows to stop Mendoza's reign of terror. He somehow gets his police job back in order to avenge his partner's death, but complains that his tiny service revolver is too small for the task. He is then lectured by his captain about his preferred enormous revolver being against regulations; McBain responds by blasting the regulation book out of the Captain's hand. Presumably after getting his job back, he comes face to face with Mendoza in an alley with Mendoza, while mockingly admonishing McBain for "quitting retirement," proceeding to try and sic a live Cobra on him as a "Cobra plan", only for McBain to punch out the cobra. Later, McBain ambushes Mendoza during a meeting by dramatically bursting out of an ice statue on the dining table with the one-liner "ice to see you". However, Mendoza eludes capture by offering McBain a drugged salmon puff. Mendoza's men are instructed to dispose of the unconscious McBain, but they somehow fail off-screen. McBain decides to finally storm Mendoza's headquarters atop a skyscraper. He interrupts another meeting, kills Mendoza's men, and hurls Mendoza out of a window onto a parked gas tanker which explodes on impact, finishing Mendoza once and for all. McBain then decides to sleep with his sexy female accomplice, McBabe.

After killing Mendoza, McBain apparently leaves the police force to become a transport plane pilot. In one incident he is helping to deliver UNICEF-collected pennies to children, when he is suddenly attacked by a squadron of Commie-Nazis. In an attempt to save the pennies a literally-on fire McBain leaps onto one of the Commie-Nazi jet fighters and kills the pilot.


Main Series

  • McBain (1990)
  • McBain II: You Have the Right to Remain Dead (1991)
  • McBain III (1992)
  • McBain IV (1994)
  • McBain V: Fatal Discharge (1996)
  • McBain VI: The Final Chapter (2000)
  • McBain VII (2008)