Milhouse: I don't want to live in a world without Bart! [jumps down a cliff into the water]
Marge: Can he swim?
Bart: [cool] What do you think?
Marge: Maggie, that's not what you do with a hymnal! [she sees Homer flossing his teeth with a Bible's bookmark] Homer!
Homer: What? I forgot to floss today. [Marge snatches the book away from him]
Bart: We tried to break up your parents and we broke up mine!
Milhouse: Wanna call my therapist and tell her how you feel? (dials into his cell phone) Hello, Dr. Wexler?
Dr. Wexler: [over phone] Stop calling me! I'm on my honeymoon! [to her husband] Yeah, it's that weird kid again.
Homer: Fifteen dollars to infect your kids! Now featuring the Pox Box! [disclaimer fast] Pox Box not recommended for pregnant or nursing women. As with any disease box, results may vary. [normal] Pox Box!
Luann: Kirk, you look good. Have you been working out?
Kirk: Well, dogs have been chasing me.
Luann: No one's been chasing me lately.
Kirk: What happened to your last boyfriend? The one who would always go to the gym after visiting you, then have lunch at that place downtown? You know, his taillight's broken?
Luann: I'm not seeing him anymore.
Kirk: Does that mean that there might be a chance for me?
Luann: Almost anyone's got a chance now.
Bart: Mom, Dad, I'd pay you a kajillion dollars for you and Mom to get back together again.
Homer: Make it 2 kajillion.
Homer: We'll lose the first kajillion to taxes.
Bart: Now, we'll get my mom and dad's attention, and you shove the dummy in the water. Any questions?
Milhouse: Yeah, what are you going as for Halloween?
Bart: Pile of dog doo. Let's roll.
Bart: This is all my fault. I planted Mom's bra in Milhouse's parents' bed.
Homer: Why, you little... [Grunting while strangling Bart]
Milhouse: [noticing his parents kissing] Sweet Lizzie McGuire!
Bart: You think that's traumatic? [he opens the bathroom door and we see Homer in only underwear with a face on his belly]
Homer: Mr. Stomach, are you hungry? [he now talks through the face using the belly button as the mouth, moving it as he talks] I'm always hungry! Now make with the pizza, fatso! [he chuckles and then it's Homer talking normally] You're the stomach. [he shoves a pizza in his belly, making eating sounds, and then stops once he notices Bart] I have to do this for work. [he closes the door]