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ā—„ Singin' In The Lane
Mr. Lisa's Opus
Gone Boy ā–ŗ
Homer: Why you little --
Bart: I'm not little. I'm 20, and I live at home.
Homer: Why you disappointing --
Bart: You know you're choking someone who can vote.
Homer: But did you vote?
Bart: No.
Homer: Why you little --

Homer: Stop drinking? That's like asking a golfer to stop drinking!

Homer: Ned, I have to quit drinking. Now!
Ned: All right, soberino, it's just 12 simple steps.
Homer: Oh, 12?
Ned: Fine. Nine.
Homer: Oh!

Ned: Okay, step one: admit you're powerless.
Homer: I'm powerless. Boom! Done.
Ned: Step two: admit there is a power greater than yourself.
Homer: Um, if I'm powerless, isn't every power greater than myself?
Ned: This is the 12 steps, not 20 questions. Now, make a decision to turn your life to God.
Homer: [Scoffs] God. He's in every deal, like undercoating. Fine.
Ned: Make a searching moral inventory of yourself.
Homer: If I have one tiny flaw, it's that I have many enormous flaws.
Ned: Admit the nature of your wrongs.
Homer: Well, I'm not the best parallel parker.
Ned: Are you ready for God to remove these defects?
Homer: Dear Lord, the Satan of Heaven. I order you to fix me.

Caitlyn Hi. I'm Caitlyn.
Lisa [Gasps] My roommate. So, you play an instrument?
Caitlyn Bari Sax.
Lisa Are you good?
Caitlyn I played at Kenny G's funeral.
Lisa [thinking -Ooh, shes pretty impressive-] Uh... any childhood heartbreak?
Caitlyn My parents forgot my birthday three times.
Lisa [thinking: -She beats me at everything! I don't belong here-]
Caitlyn While you were feeling inferior, I took the top bunk.
Lisa [exasperated grunt]

Lisa At least you're having a good time.
Bart These girls want me to piss off their parents before they head home [moaning while kissing girl]
Mandy's dad Get away from him Mandy! I'll pay! I'll pay!
Bart Tell him I have two kids. The beauty part is, it's not a lie.
Lisa You always know what to say, Bart.


ā—„ Season 28 Season 29 Quotes Season 30 ā–ŗ
The Serfsons • Springfield Splendor • Whistler's Father • Treehouse of Horror XXVIII • Grampy Can Ya Hear Me • The Old Blue Mayor She Ain't What She Used to Be • Singin' in the Lane • Mr. Lisa's Opus • Gone Boy • Haw-Haw Land • Frink Gets Testy • Homer Is Where the Art Isn't • 3 Scenes Plus a Tag from a Marriage • Fears of a Clown • No Good Read Goes Unpunished • King Leer • Lisa Gets the Blues • Forgive and Regret • Left Behind • Throw Grampa from the Dane • Flanders' Ladder
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