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Singin' In The Lane
Mr. Lisa's Opus
Gone Boy
Homer: Why you little --
Bart: I'm not little. I'm 20, and I live at home.
Homer: Why you disappointing --
Bart: You know you're choking someone who can vote.
Homer: But did you vote?
Bart: No.
Homer: Why you little --

Homer: Stop drinking? That's like asking a golfer to stop drinking!

Homer: Ned, I have to quit drinking. Now!
Ned: All right, soberino, it's just 12 simple steps.
Homer: Oh, 12?
Ned: Fine. Nine.
Homer: Oh!

Ned: Okay, step one: admit you're powerless.
Homer: I'm powerless. Boom! Done.
Ned: Step two: admit there is a power greater than yourself.
Homer: Um, if I'm powerless, isn't every power greater than myself?
Ned: This is the 12 steps, not 20 questions. Now, make a decision to turn your life to God.
Homer: [Scoffs] God. He's in every deal, like undercoating. Fine.
Ned: Make a searching moral inventory of yourself.
Homer: If I have one tiny flaw, it's that I have many enormous flaws.
Ned: Admit the nature of your wrongs.
Homer: Well, I'm not the best parallel parker.
Ned: Are you ready for God to remove these defects?
Homer: Dear Lord, the Satan of Heaven. I order you to fix me.

Caitlyn Hi. I'm Caitlyn.
Lisa [Gasps] My roommate. So, you play an instrument?
Caitlyn Bari Sax.
Lisa Are you good?
Caitlyn I played at Kenny G's funeral.
Lisa [thinking -Ooh, shes pretty impressive-] Uh... any childhood heartbreak?
Caitlyn My parents forgot my birthday three times.
Lisa [thinking: -She beats me at everything! I don't belong here-]
Caitlyn While you were feeling inferior, I took the top bunk.
Lisa [exasperated grunt]

Lisa At least you're having a good time.
Bart These girls want me to piss off their parents before they head home [moaning while kissing girl]
Mandy's dad Get away from him Mandy! I'll pay! I'll pay!
Bart Tell him I have two kids. The beauty part is, it's not a lie.
Lisa You always know what to say, Bart.


Season 28 Season 29 Quotes Season 30
The SerfsonsSpringfield SplendorWhistler's FatherTreehouse of Horror XXVIIIGrampy Can Ya Hear MeThe Old Blue Mayor She Ain't What She Used to BeSingin' in the LaneMr. Lisa's OpusGone BoyHaw-Haw LandFrink Gets TestyHomer Is Where the Art Isn't3 Scenes Plus a Tag from a MarriageFears of a ClownNo Good Read Goes UnpunishedKing LeerLisa Gets the BluesForgive and RegretLeft BehindThrow Grampa from the DaneFlanders' Ladder
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