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Credits
The Spy Who Learned Me
Ned 'N Edna's Blend Agenda
Lisa Goes Gaga
Bart: What the hey, Ms. K.
Edna: Thank God, a real kid.
Bart: Want my advice on dealing with the Hardly Boys?
Edna: Why do you care?
Bart: I don't, I'm just bored, watching worms drown.
Edna: Okay, what have you got?
Bart: Well, what you've gotta is get them into the real world.
Todd: Skipping is cool!
Rod: Especially when you're holding hands with your brother!
Bart: If you don't act now, when they grow up, people like me are gonna take all their money, and girlfriends.
Edna: Oh come on, they're not that hopeless.
Todd: I'm doing it! I'm doing it!
[Todd is riding a tricycle, but falls. Bart and Edna look at each other, and then look at Rod and Todd.]

Homer Simpson: [as Jesus] Ye cannot judge me. Only my Father can judge me.
Abraham Simpson: Crucify him!
Homer Simpson: I'm taking you with me, old man!

Homer Simpson: [wearing Jesus' robe] Ooh, roomy. Our Lord really knew how to keep 'em cool.

Bart Simpson: Hey, dad. Remember when you said that if Ned Flanders ever remarried you'd eat your hat?
Homer Simpson: [looking up at the crown of thorns he's wearing] Oh... [takes a bite] Ooh, licorice! [keeps eating] Mm, historically inaccurate.

Homer Simpson: Welcome to married life. Another good man bites the dust.
Marge Simpson: Homer!
Homer Simpson: What? I'm talking about that guy. [points to man on the next bed, who is flat-lining and being carted out] I sure envy him.

Ned Flanders: [dreaming of Todd's graduation] Wait a minute. Liberal professors? Feminist workshops? Abstract sculptures? This isn't a Midwestern Bible college. This is an elite East Coast university!
Todd Flanders: It's okay, Daddy. I majored in Religious Studies.
Ned Flanders: Phew.
Todd Flanders: Comparative Religious Studies! [Ned screams]

Sea Captain: I'm married to the sea, plus I have a thing on the side with two of the Great Lakes. I won't say which, but it's Erie how Superior they are.

Principal Skinner: [about Ned] My rival.
Superintendent Chalmers: Some rivalry. It's like Secretariat and a can of dog food.

(At the Flanders' dinner table)
Ned Flanders: Oh lord, please bless our blended family.
Todd Flanders: And thank you for cigarette mommy.
Edna Krabappel: Oh honey, please don't call me that.
Rod Flanders: Okay, do-over mommy.
Ned Flanders: Boys, you will please call your new mother whenever she feels comfortable with.
Edna Krabappel: How about Edna?
Todd Flanders: It's disrespectful to call a grown-up by their first name.
Bart Simpson: Yo, Homer! Mom says get your fatass over to the Flanders.
Homer Simpson: Bart! Don't call me that!
Bart Simpson: Which one? Homer or fatass?
Homer Simpson: Why you little! They're both bad and I suspect you know it! (grunting)
Bart Simpson: (strangled) Get your hands off of me, you fatass!


See more: Episode Guide
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