Saint Patrick's Day is an Irish holiday traditionally celebrated on March 17th to honor the eponymous saint. The holiday is notable for two aspects: the first was that people are to wear green clothing, or similarly green accessories on that day, and the second was it being the holiday with the largest consumption of alcohol.
History[]
Springfield tended to celebrate Saint Patrick's Day by wearing green apparel, with a consequence for failure to do so often resulting in mass pinching of the person who failed to do so (as Bart learned the hard way), as well as a Saint Patrick's Day Parade on Main Street where everyone was "feeling a little bit Irish, except for the Gays and the Italians." The parade, appropriately enough, had various floats and marching members that resembled the Irish. In addition, Moe's Tavern often has loads of customers due to the holiday being the biggest drinking period of the year, with Moe Szyslak often driving away anyone who acted as the Designated Drivers due to viewing them as "cheapskates". According to Marge, Bart frequently asks for a large funnel that he often disposes of from the car window after the parade each year.
The 1997 year of Saint Patrick's Day had some disasters occur during the annual Saint Patrick's Day Parade in Springfield. In particular, the Irish Cops who marched in the parade, while declaring there was "nothing to see" ended up whacking by accident several onlookers with their nightsticks due to their spinning them around. In addition, some of the onlookers, due to being drunk, climbed up to Kent Brockman's tower setting and disrupted Brockman's broadcast by asking around and noting they're on TV to relatives before entering a drunken brawl, causing Brockman to wonder if the traits of "drinking, violence, and destruction of private property" were what people associate with the Irish. As this was happening, the Drunken Irish Novelists of Springfield was passing by, only for the representatives to disembark after hecklers threw fully loaded beer bottles at the float and proceeded to roughhouse the hecklers. The violence got even worse after the local John Bull's Fish & Chips joint ended up randomly exploding, causing the onlookers upon witnessing this to, in a drunken elation, proceed to beat each other up.
The most infamous moment of the parade, however, occurred when the Duff Beer float arrived to spray "free beer" to the onlookers directly from the hose. When Lenny Leonard pointed out the float, the float proceeded to spray beer in a random direction, ultimately going down a plastic funnel belonging to Bart Simpson (who had been stuck between various onlookers at this time) in sufficient enough quantities to leave him extremely drunk. After the parade was over, Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, who had evidentially been plastered enough to be left tipsy, requested that the onlookers "get naked", requesting that they not be "stuck up" as it will be great. Kirk Van Houten, hearing this, decided to oblige, thinking the party was just getting started, although this celebration was cut short after an old lady spotted Bart walking down the street in a very drunken stupor, causing much shock to the onlookers due to Bart being drunk and being way below the age limit for drinking (with only Milhouse Van Houten, Rod Flanders, and Richard being overjoyed at the spectacle due to it being Bart who was drunk), eventually catching a glance at the news crew and demanding to know what they were looking at before his mother, Marge Simpson, dragged him away out of both shock and embarrassment. Homer later witnessed this event on the news at Moe's Tavern due to being present for the drinking day (with Homer at that time doing an impersonation of Ireland's prime minister by putting a barrel on his head). This particular event led directly to Springfield re-enacting Prohibition, or rather, enforcing a law that was already on the books.
Another Saint Patrick's Day parade occurred in 2008, although in that case, Mayor Quimby, citing how prior celebrations erupted into a brawl due to drunken behavior, had the town remain sober for the entire day. This backfired on him immensely, however, as the town remaining sober had both the Catholic Irish and Protestant Irish engage in a street fight during their respective parades due to their hatred to each other remaining unabated. Aside from the parades, other landmarks for that year were a tent featuring Irish dancing, shamrock shakes and the paddywagon.
Floats for the parade[]
The parade floats were of the following, at least in regards to the 1997 year:
- 2000 Years of Irish Cops
- Pot 'o' Gold
- Saint Patrick
- Drunken Irish Novelists of Springfield
- Duff Beer spray float
The following floats for the 2008 were of the following:
- Catholic Irish
- Irish boy most resembling a potato
- Straight Catholic Priests (only two were seen that year)
- Small Irish Family
- Protestant Irish
- Pride of Usher banners
- Union Jack flags.
Trivia[]
- When using the confessional to confess his possibly shooting Mr. Burns and denying he was Catholic, Waylon Smithers admitted that he did once try to march in a St. Patrick's Day parade only to be given implied refusal (which was presumed to be due to his heavily implied homosexuality).