"I'm gonna pop a cap in your ass."
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Scammer and Z-Dog is a line of snack machines. Principal Skinner signed a contract with the company that owned the machines, allowing them to be placed in
Springfield Elementary School.
The machines sold only high-sugar / high-calorie items (i.e., soda, chips, and candy) with ingredients of highly questionable healthfulness, such as "monosodium poisonate" and "partially de-weaponized plutonium." When Bart got hooked on the machines' snacks (to the point where he refused all other foods), he quickly gained a large amount of weight, had a heart attack, and was sent to a fat camp to slim down and kick his junk food addiction. However, the camp was very expensive, and the family was forced to turn their house into a youth hostel for extra income, in order to afford the bills.
Camp counsellor Tab Spangler later showed Bart the sacrifices his family was making to send him to camp, and Bart was shocked to see them being mistreated by German backpackers. Bart then went to Springfield Elementary and destroyed the machines with an axe, in the process taking the money from all of the junk-food sales. Bart returned home and said he was cured because Spangler had showed him the true cost of his addiction. He then gave the money from the machines to his parents to pay the bills from the fat camp, and Homer quickly threw the backpackers out of the house.
The machines are short singing phrases with slang to attract the children.
They sell products such as "Krishna Krisps", "Amazonkers", "Dalai Lamanade", "Lollapalollipops" and "Choco-Nards".
Scammer is voiced by Hank Azaria, while Z-Dog is voiced by Dan Castellaneta.