Krusty the Clown: "And now for our parody of Mad About You entitled, "Mad About Shoe".
(goes to a bed with a giant shoe in it)
Hey baby, let's kiss, no tongue.
(audience boos)
Ugh, You're not going to like our N.Y.P.D Shoe sketch... it's pretty much the same thing."
Homer Simpson: (Chasing after a nanny, trying to prove she's a man) Gimmie those!
Krusty: And now, Gerald Ford!
(Gerald Ford appears)
Gerald Ford: Thank you for having me, Krusty.
(Ford gives speech while Krusty makes faces behind him and crawl repeats "BORING!")
Gerald Ford: Now I would like to speak about something that is very important. The Boy Scouts of America have been molding men for generations but their membership has declined in recent years. I encourage all boys to consider...
(Gerald Ford sees Krusty making faces)
Gerald Ford: What are you doing?
Krusty: Thank you for coming. All the good presidents were busy! So, how are things with Nancy?
Gerald Ford: Betty!
TV Announcer: And now let's take a look at a young Charles Bronson in his short lived stint replacing Andy Griffith on The Andy Griffith Show.
Don Knots: Where's Otis? He not in his cell.
Charles: I shot him.
Don: Well that's just... you WHAT?!
Charles: Now I'm going down to Emmett's Fix-It-Shop...to fix Emmett.
Groundskeeper Willie: Shary Bobbins and I were engaged to be wed back in the old country. Then she got her eyesight back. Suddenly the ugliest man in Glasgow wasn't good enough for her!
Sharry Bobbins: It's good to see you, Willie.
Willie: That's not what you said the first time you saw me!
Quentin Tarantino: (following his Itchy & Scratchy cartoon) What I'm trying to say in this cartoon is that violence is everywhere in our society. You know, it's, like, even in breakfast cereals, man.
Pennyfeather: Hello, I'm Mrs. Pennyfeather. I understand you are looking for a nanny.
Marge: Pleased to meet you.
Homer: Wait a minute, Marge. I saw "Mrs. Doubtfire." This is a man in drag! [starts pulling at her hair as if it were a wig] You're phony! Fakey, phony broad! [runs after her] Gimme those!
Marge: Homer, if you're going to do that to every applicant, we're never going to find one.
Homer: Sorry.
Periwinkle: Hello, I'm Mrs. Periwinkle.
[Homer growls and jumps after her]
Kearney: I'm here about the nanny job. I'll keep a watchful eye on your kids and if they get out of line (hits his fist in his hand) pow!
Homer: I like him.
Kearney: Thanks and where do you keep the liquor?
Homer: I hide a bottle of schnapps in the baby's crib.
Marge: I'm sorry young man, but you're not what we're looking for.
Kearney:(muttering) You tell me you blue-haired witch.
