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Simpsons Bible Stories |
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- Krusty: Now, I'm not saying Jezebel's easy, but before she moved to Sodom, it was known for its pottery!
- Bart (David): What say you now, Goliath? Without your hair, you no longer possess your fantastic strength!
- Nelson: That's Samson, idiot!
- Homer: I shall cut the pie in half (he does so) and each man will get... death.
- Homer (Adam): Oh, my dear, sweet Eve. I love you even better than the butterscotch pond or the porno bush.
- Homer (Adam): You're pretty uptight for a naked chick.
- Milhouse (Moses): Well, Lisa, we're out of Egypt. So, what's next for the Israelites? Land of milk and honey?
- Lisa: (consulting a scroll) Hmm, well, actually it looks like we're in for forty years of wandering the desert.
- Milhouse (Moses): Forty years? But after that, it's clear sailing for the Jews, right?
- Lisa: (nervously) Uh-huh-hum, more or less. Hey, is that manna?
- (The children cheer and run off into the distance)
- Marge: Oh no, it's the Apocalypse! Bart, are you wearing clean underwear?
- Bart: Not anymore.
- Lisa: It's the Rapture and I never knew true love!
- Homer: I never used those pizza coupons!