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Blood Feud
Stark Raving Dad
Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington
Homer: Pink?! I can't wear pink to work! Everybody wears white. I'm not popular enough to be different!

Lenny: Hey, Homer we saved you a doughnut.
Carl: It has pink frosting.
Homer: Thanks! It looks- Hey, wait a minute! Just because I'm wearing pink doesn't mean I'm some kind of pink doughnut-eater! Although it is tempting.

Mr. Burns: Wait a minute. Go back. Zoom in. Why is that man in pink?!
Smithers: That's Homer Simpson, a boob from Sector 7-G.
Mr. Burns: Judging by his outlandish attire, he's some sort of free-thinking anarchist!
Smithers: I'll call security, sir.
Mr. Burns: Excellent. Yes, these color monitors have already paid for themselves.

Doctor: Mrs. Simpson, I'm sorry, but your husband suffers from a persecution complex, extreme paranoia, and bladder hostility.
Marge: Doctor, if you just talk to him for five minutes without mentioning our son Bart, you'd see how sane he is.
Doctor: (shocked) You mean there really is a Bart?! Good Lord!

Homer: How can you tell who's sane and who's insane?
Man: We have a very simple method. (stamps Homer) Whoever has that stamp on his hand is insane.

Man: Put him in with the big white guy who thinks he's the little black guy.

"Michael Jackson": Bart, are you not concerned that Lisa is upset? When I was growing up and did not have a lot of money, do you know what I did when one of my sisters' birthdays came up?
Bart: You stiffed them?
"Michael Jackson": No! I wrote them a song.
Bart holds up a cover of Michael Jackson's Thriller to show that Michael Jackson is black
Bart: Hello, Looney Tunes, this is Michael Jackson! Can you see the difference?
"Michael Jackson": Bart, either Michael Jackson is in a recording studio in Los Angeles or he is right here in your house offering to help you. It is up to you as to what you believe.

"Michael Jackson": I'm Michael Jackson, from the Jacksons.
Homer: I'm Homer Simpson, from the Simpsons.

At the mental hospital, Homer is among a circle of patients gathered to explain their cases.
Dave: I used to work as a VP in an insurance company, but then one morning when I woke up, I couldn't leave the house.
Homer: Was the door locked?
Dave: No, I just couldn't face what was out there.
Homer: Was it raining?
Nurse: No, Homer. Dave suffers from agoraphobia: a fear of open areas and crowds. Please, Dave go on.
Dave: Anyway, I knew I just couldn't take that drive to work.
Homer: Were you out of gas?
Everyone stares at him.
Homer: (scoffs) Baby.

Doctor: This guy is the chief. He's been here since 1968. Never says a word.
Homer: Hey, Chief.
The Chief: Hello. It's about time somebody reached out to me.

"Michael Jackson": I can't believe you never heard of me. I'm a very popular entertainer.
Homer: Of course I've heard of you. You'd have to be living under a rock... What's your name?
"Michael Jackson": Michael Jackson.
Homer: Doesn't ring a bell.
"Michael Jackson": Heard of MTV, or Motown?
Homer: No.
"Michael Jackson": "Beat It"?
Homer: You beat it!
"Michael Jackson": "Thriller"?
Homer: What was that?
"Michael Jackson": "Thriller".
Homer: No.

Bart: Hey, Mom, Dad's in a mental institution.
Marge: Oh my God! Mother was right!

Bart: Who are you?
"Michael Jackson": I'm Michael Jackson.
Bart: The Michael Jackson? No way.
"Michael Jackson": I'm with your father in a mental institution.
Bart: Uh-huh. And is Elvis with you?
"Michael Jackson": He could be. It's a big hospital.

Homer calls home from mental institution.
Bart: (answers the phone) Joe's Taxidermy. You snuff 'em, we stuff 'em.
Homer: (angrily) Boy!! When I get home, I'm gonna wrap my hands around your neck...
People look at Homer for his rambling.
Homer: (nervously, not wanting to remain in the institution) ...and smother you with kisses.
Bart: (annoyed) Homer, whatever they've got you on, cut the dose.
Season 2 Season 3 Quotes Season 4
Stark Raving DadMr. Lisa Goes to WashingtonWhen Flanders FailedBart the MurdererHomer DefinedLike Father, Like ClownTreehouse of Horror IILisa's PonySaturdays of ThunderFlaming Moe'sBurns Verkaufen der KraftwerkI Married MargeRadio BartLisa the GreekHomer AloneBart the LoverHomer at the BatSeparate VocationsDog of DeathColonel HomerBlack WidowerThe Otto ShowBart's Friend Falls in LoveBrother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?