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|Stark Raving Dad||
- Homer: Pink?! I can't wear pink to work! Everybody wears white. I'm not popular enough to be different!
- Lenny: Hey, Homer we saved you a doughnut.
- Carl: It has pink frosting.
- Homer: Thanks! It looks- Hey, wait a minute! Just because I'm wearing pink doesn't mean I'm some kind of pink doughnut-eater! Although it is tempting.
- Mr. Burns: Wait a minute. Go back.Zoom in. Why is that man in pink?!
- Smithers: That's Homer Simpson, a boob from Sector 7-G.
- Mr. Burns: Judging by his outlandish attire, he's some sort of free-thinking anarchist!
- Smithers: I'll call security, sir.
- Mr. Burns: Excellent. Yes, these color monitors have already paid for themselves.
- Doctor: Mrs. Simpson, I'm sorry, but your husband suffers from a persecution complex, extreme paranoia, and bladder hostility.
- Marge: Doctor, if you just talk to him for five minutes without mentioning our son, Bart, you'd see how sane he is.
- Doctor: You mean there really is a Bart?! Good Lord!
- Homer: How can you tell who's sane and who's insane?
- Man: We have a very simple method. (stamps Homer) Whoever has that stamp on his hand is insane.
- Man: Put him in with the big white guy who thinks he's the little black guy.
- "Michael Jackson": Bart, are you not concerned that Lisa is upset? When I was growing up and did not have a lot of money, do you know what I did when one of my sisters' birthdays came up?
- Bart: You stiffed them?
- "Michael Jackson": No! I wrote them a song.
- Bart holds up a cover of Michael Jackson's Thriller to show that Michael Jackson is black
- Bart: Hello, Looney Tunes, this is Michael Jackson! Can you see the difference?
- "Michael Jackson": Bart, either Michael Jackson is in a recording studio in Los Angeles or he is right here in your house offering to help you. It is up to you as to what you believe.
- "Michael Jackson": I'm Michael Jackson, from the Jacksons.
- Homer: I'm Homer Simpson, from the Simpsons.
- At the mental hospital, Homer is among a circle of patients gathered to explain their cases.
- Dave: I used to work as a VP in an insurance company, but then one morning when I woke up, I couldn't leave the house.
- Homer: Was the door locked?
- Dave: No, I just couldn't face what was out there.
- Homer: Was it raining?
- Nurse: No, Homer. Dave suffers from agoraphobia: a fear of open areas and crowds. Please, Dave go on.
- Dave: Anyway, I knew I just couldn't take that drive to work.
- Homer: Were you out of gas?
- Everyone stares at him.
- Homer: (scoffs) Baby.
- Doctor: This guy is the chief. He's been here since 1968. Never says a word.
- Homer: Hey, Chief.
- The Chief: Hello. It's about time somebody reached out to me.
- "Michael Jackson": I can't believe you never heard of me. I'm a very popular entertainer.
- Homer: Of course I've heard of you. You'd have to be living under a rock... What's your name?
- "Michael Jackson": Michael Jackson.
- Homer: Doesn't ring a bell.
- "Michael Jackson": Heard of MTV, or Motown?
- Homer: No.
- "Michael Jackson": "Beat It"?
- Homer: You beat it!
- "Michael Jackson": "Thriller"?
- Homer: What was that?
- "Michael Jackson": "Thriller".
- Homer: No.
- Bart: Hey, Mom, Dad's in a mental institution.
- Marge: Oh my God! Mother was right!
- Bart: Who are you?
- "Michael Jackson": I'm Michael Jackson.
- Bart: The Michael Jackson? No way.
- "Michael Jackson": I'm with your father in a mental institution.
- Bart: Uh-huh. And is Elvis with you?
- "Michael Jackson": He could be. It's a big hospital.
- Homer calls home from mental institution.
- Bart: Joe's Taxidermy. You snuff 'em, we stuff 'em.
- Homer: Boy, when I get home, I'm gonna wrap my hands around your neck and...
- People look at Homer.
- Homer: ...Smother you with kisses.
- Bart: Homer, whatever they've got you on, cut the dose.