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The Great Money Caper |
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- After the magic show was a big letdown
- Homer: 60 cents? I would've made more if I'd gone into work today!
- Bart: Hey, don't blame me, I've got to compete with TV and the Internet!
- Homer: A good son would come through for his dad!
- Bart: Yeah, and a good dad wouldn't miss his son's little league games!
- Homer: I told you, I find them boring!
- Bart: Well, I showed up for all your stupid interventions!
- Homer: Oh, that's it! You can walk home!
- (Homer gets in his car and drives off)
- Bart: Dad, come back! Oh, I can't walk home with all this stuff! :(Sighs)
- Mrs. Hibbert: Poor boy! Here's some money for a bus fare!
- Sideshow Mel: My father was a monster too.
- Michael Jackson look-a-like puppets man: Come on, brothers, dig deep!
- (Homer is still driving home)
- Homer: Stupid non-magical son can't pay to fix my car!
- Homer: Lies got us into this mess, Son. From now on, it's honesty all the way.
- (at Home)
- Marge: You were carjacked … in the church parking lot?!
- Homer: Absolutely. We had stopped in for a quick prayer, when -- Bart, would you call him a crazy man?
- Bart: Definitely … well, crazy about carjacking.
- Lisa: What did he look like?
- Homer: Um … let's see … he was … foreign … and he had…
- Bart: Wild, bushy hair -- like an animal!
- Lisa: Anything else?
- Homer: Well, he seemed like a loner -- kept to himself, mostly.
- Bart: And, he said if we went to the cops, he'd come back for Maggie.
- Marge: (Gasps) Oh, dear! We don't want that!
- Homer: Any who, the whole nightmare has really made us sleepy. Let's hit the hay.
- Bart: Why are we still grifting? The car's paid for; doesn't that balance out the universe?
- Homer: In a way, but I also remembered some other stuff, like my bike that was stolen in third grade. Plus the baldness.
- Bart: Okay, I'm sold.
- Lisa: I don't know, Mom, I think they're up to something.
- Marge: Sure looks that way, but at least Bart and Homer are spending quality time together.
- Lisa: It that a Long Island iced tea?
- Marge: Oh, this? Hmm, I think it is! (Drinks it) You're a pretty girl. (Pats Lisa's face)