Das Bus
The Last Temptation of Krust
Dumbbell Indemnity
Krusty: So this afternoon, two suits come up to me and ask me to endorse a new sports utility vehicle.
[Crowd gasps]
Homer: [shouting] Don't you hate pants?

Agnes: Oh you’re burning it all wrong Seymour.
Principle Skinner: It's my allowance mother; I'll burn it however I want.

Bart: I don't get it, Krusty. You said you would never be a shill again!
Krusty: Me, I learned something about myself today. It ain't comedy that's in my blood. It's selling out.

Bart: What do we need church shoes for? Jesus wore sandals!

[Rod and Todd find Krusty passed out in their backyard and poke him with sticks]
Todd: Wow, a clown! Do you think he's evil?
Rod: [sniffs] He smells evil.
Todd: [sniffs] Should we tell Daddy?
Rod: No. Let's poke him a little while longer.

Homer: Heh heh heh, from now on, I'm gonna be just like Krusty and tell it like it is. Marge, you're getting a little fat around the old thighs!
Bart: Dad!
Homer: You too, Bart!
Marge: Oh, knock it off, Homer; you're the fattest one in the car!
Homer: [shocked] You didn't have to tell it like it is, Marge!

Exec 1: Wow... they're hanging on his every word! Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Exec 2: I hope so... [puts his hand on his colleague's]
Exec 1: I thought I made myself clear in Boston.

[Marge and Homer enter Moe's]
Marge: Four drink minimum?
Homer: I'll cover ya, honey.

Krusty: Last night's comedy benefit delivered wall-to-wall laughs without exception... Phew! The only exception was the dated humor of Springfield's green haired, red-nosed hack... [turns pages] Yeah yeah yeah... Krusty the Clown! Ohhhhh...

Guy: Five minutes, Krusty.
Krusty: Oh, I ain't going back out there.
Guy: No, five minutes to get your stuff and get out!

Krusty: Jay, you're a professional comedian, right? Right?? Answer me!
Jay Leno: Yes! Now, stop squirming. I'm trying to get these tangles out.
Bart: [speaks in a prissy feminine voice] Oh, they are just impossible.
[Krusty and Jay Leno stop and stare at Bart weirdly]
Bart: Well, they are.

Season 8 Season 9 Quotes Season 10
The City of New York vs. Homer SimpsonThe Principal and the PauperLisa's SaxTreehouse of Horror VIIIThe Cartridge FamilyBart StarThe Two Mrs. NahasapeemapetilonsLisa the SkepticRealty BitesMiracle on Evergreen TerraceAll Singing, All DancingBart CarnyThe Joy of SectDas BusThe Last Temptation of KrustDumbbell IndemnityLisa the SimpsonThis Little WiggySimpson TideThe Trouble with TrillionsGirly EditionTrash of the TitansKing of the HillLost Our LisaNatural Born Kissers
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