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Marge: (walking funny) I used to walk like this until my tendons snapped. They heard it in Ogdenville.

Homer: I'm Elvis! Elvis Jagger. Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar.

Lisa: Dad, how could you?
Milhouse: Because he's the kind who kisses and leaves you!

Lisa: I can't believe you stood Mom up.
Bart: Face it Lis... Men are dogs, the worse we treat you, the more you want us.
Lisa: That's not what dogs do.
Bart: Lisa said, "Dog doo!"
Homer: Heh heh heh, she sure did. Now, if Lisa is finished with her shenanigans, I'll tell you why I didn't show up.

Bart: Let me get this straight. When you were my age, you had the hots for Mom and didn't even know it? That's cool! Or is it lame? I guess I'll go with lame. You're lame!
Homer: Why, because I've only kissed one girl in my whole life? That's still one more than you.
Bart: I've kissed 3 girls.
Homer: (crying) I'm so lame!

Milhouse: (after kissing Homer) My first kiss.

Milhouse: (while playing "Spin the Bottle") Round and round the bottle twirls, I hope it stops on one of the girls. (the bottle lands on Sherri and Terri's cousin) I hope you like the taste of ringworm medicine.

Marge: You won't be kissing anyone for a while.
Homer: Well, that stinks, but I'll still get to kiss you, right?

Season 14 Season 15 Quotes Season 16
Treehouse of Horror XIVMy Mother the CarjackerThe President Wore PearlsThe Regina MonologuesThe Fat and the FurriestToday, I Am a Clown'Tis the Fifteenth SeasonMarge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens and GaysI, D'oh-BotDiatribe of a Mad HousewifeMargical History TourMilhouse Doesn't Live Here AnymoreSmart and SmarterThe Ziff Who Came to DinnerCo-Dependent's DayThe Wandering JuvieMy Big Fat Geek WeddingCatch 'Em if You CanSimple SimpsonThe Way We Weren'tBart-Mangled BannerFraudcast News
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