|| The Wettest Stories Ever Told
- [The Boney crew appear as skeletons on their ship]
- Bart: Can ya give us directions to Tahiti?
- Dolph: Nice going, genius. You sailed into someone else's tale of the sea.
- Bart: Hey, at least I'm not gay for skeleton Kearney.
- [Camera pans out to reveal that Dolph's ribs cages are caught on Kearney's]
- Dolph: Our ribs got tangled 75 years ago, that's not gay.
- Bart: Yeah, you keep believing that.
- [A wave hits the Mayflower ship and the Captain is knocked out]
- Rev. Lovejoy: Our captain's be-head-bumped! oh, I guess we'll never make it to the new world.
- Bart: [sad] Oh, when we landed I was going to denounce my sister as a witch.
- Lisa: [angry at Bart] I keep telling you the ability to add two-digit numbers is NOT witchcraft!
- Bart: Thirty one plus forty tree?
- Lisa: Seventy four.
- Everybody: [pointing at Lisa] Witch! Witch! Witch!
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