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ā—„ Homer's Odyssey
There's No Disgrace Like Home
Bart the General ā–ŗ
Marge: I don't want to alarm anyone, but I think there's a li'l al-key-hol in this punch.

Mr. Burns: [Seeing a son kiss his father on the cheek] Awww... That's the kind of family unity I like to see. Smithers, get that man's name. I predict big things for him down at the power plant.
Homer: Quick, Bart, give me a kiss.
Bart: Kiss you? But, Dad, I'm your kid!
Homer: Bart, please. Five bucks for a kiss.



Homer: I'm sorry, Marge, but sometimes I think we're the worst family in town.
Marge: Well maybe we should move to a larger community.
Homer: D'oh!



Homer: When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!



[The Simpsons peer through a dining room window, watching another family happily eating dinner together.]
Homer: Look at that, kids! No fighting, no yelling.
Bart: No belching.
Lisa: That dad has a shirt on!
Marge: Look, napkins!
Bart: These people are obviously freaks.



Homer: I've murdered us all (i've murdered us all), Shut Up! (shut up, shut up) Doh'! (do'h)

Template:Season 1

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