Homer: Your mother is the switch witch! A sort of tooth fairy dealie.
Marge: I take your sugary sweets and I give you healthy items! Plain brown toothbrushes, (puts a toothbrush in Lisa's bag) unflavored dental floss, (puts a box of dental floss in Maggie's bag) and fun-sized mouthwashes! (puts a mouthwasher bottle in Bart's bag) TSA approved!
Bart: This is exactly why kids need a union.
The Diving Bell and the Butterball
Homer: Ok. I'm the floor. I can't move. So far, a normal Sunday morning...
Homer: Halloween: the one time of the year where the squalor of our home works to our advantage.
Homer: For further communication, I will require more beans.
Ned Flanders: Spend less time on your back and more time on your knees.
Ned: (narrating, watching Mr. Burns dump nuclear waste at a lake) All these years, I thought murder was a sin. Then, I got new instructions from the good Lord himself in his favorite language: English.